Guilt Can Be a Positive

Guilt Can Be a Positive

 

While feeding the cats this morning, two males got into a kerfuffle. I stuck my foot between the two moggie pugilists and gently but firmly sent them to their mutual corners.  One of the participants, the victim, decided to make himself scarce for a time. Meanwhile, the instigator continued chowing down. Enter my father. My siblings can attest that my dad can cut quite the intimidating figure. It seems apparent that even cats can appreciate this. Dad sternly stated the aggressor’s name and walked towards him. The feline perpetrator may be the alpha among the cats, but he slinked away from my father. The guilty glances he returned to my father said, “Yes, I did something I should not have done.” Even so, the guilty cat lacks the intellect to grow from having been caught in his transgression. 

Despite being human, there may be many persons able to identify with our mischievous cat. They may feel guilty when confronted with their sin, but they will not allow that discomfort to prompt restoration. Eventually, they will sufficiently recover to resume their everyday life. Hence, wrongdoers may view guilt as a wholly negative emotion, a pesky nuisance. Sadly, they might find validation from a few pop psychologists. I recall one Christian telling me that her therapist assured her that she would feel better if she would discard her pesky religious convictions. Despite what such pop psychologists have said in the past, this guilt can be a positive. The apostle Paul addresses this subject in his second epistle to the Corinthians. 

“For the sorrow that is according to the will of God produces a repentance without regret, leading to salvation, but the sorrow of the world produces death.” (2 Corinthians 7.10 NASB1995) 

So, if you will permit me to anthropomorphize my cats further, my cat experienced worldly sorrow. This lack of godly sorrow means that the next time a similar situation confronts this male cat, he will fall back into the same behavior that earned his initial rebuke. 

Fortunately, God gave humans the propensity to experience sorrow according to His will. This sorrow can lead to repentance (2 Corinthians 7.8-9). No one enjoys being like Nathan, pointing the accusatory finger at a friend (cf. 2 Samuel 12.1-15), not even Paul.  Paul said that he initially regretted his role (2 Corinthians 7.8). However, such finger-pointers realize, like Paul, that inflicting momentary guilt leads to a restoration of another’s relationship with God. The only prerequisite for imposing godly sorrow upon another is to ensure your eye is free of beams while spotting specks in your brother’s eye (Matthew 7.3-5). 

We feel guilt for a reason. Guilt helps us understand that our actions have strained our relationship with God and others. As such, guilt causes us to preserve our connective bonds. When acknowledging we have wronged someone, we make amends to them. We will not allow the rift to continue or grow. Research also suggests that you may be more trustworthy if you are more prone to feel guilt (Emamzadeh). Such guilt-prone people are more reliable because they want to avoid the guilt that comes from strained relationships entirely.  Therefore, they will avoid situations imperiling a relationship. Just as a quick aside, we should not confuse shame with guilt either. Shame causes a person to see themselves as a failure rather than seeing a mistake that they can rectify with another. We all sin and fall short of God’s glory (Romans 3.23). So, we all have flaws. However, we can make sure that we do not purposely do anything disrupting our relationship with God and others. To that end, guilt can be a positive thing that though uncomfortable, leads to our refining in the fire. 

Work Cited 

Emamzadeh, Arash. “New Research Determines Who You Can Trust the Most.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, 20 Sept. 2018, www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/finding-new-home/201809/new-research-determines-who-you-can-trust-the-most

 

David’s Year Away From God

David’s Year Away From God

Thursday’s Column: Carlnormous Comments

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Carl Pollard

 
“You’re the man” is what we say when someone comes through for us. It’s used as a compliment that helps us convey our gratitude. “You’re the man” means that the person you’re saying it to deserves to be praised for what they’ve done or will do. We find this same phrase in scripture, but it’s used in a completely different manner.
 
David was a man after God’s own heart, but he was still a man. He made mistakes and sometimes failed to live the way he should. There’s one instance in his life that we are all familiar with. 2 Samuel 11 records for us the time David committed adultery with Bathsheba and got her pregnant. In order to cover his tracks he had her husband killed. Chapter 11 ends with Bathsheba crying over her husband’s death, while David waits for her to get over it so he can move her into his house.
 
This chain of sins committed by David creates a rift in his relationship with God. The last phrase we read in chapter 11 is that “the things that David had done displeased the Lord.”
 
What I find interesting is that God doesn’t immediately punish David. He didn’t do anything when David first slept with her, He didn’t do anything when David killed her husband, and God didn’t punish him when he bore a son with Bathsheba. For what appears to be about a year, David seems to live without any consequences for his sins. But this lack of immediate punishment didn’t mean that God was overlooking David’s sin. Rather, God had a plan that we read of in chapter 12.
 
David found himself in a place that he wasn’t normally in. For a year he wasn’t a man after God’s own heart, but his own heart. For 12 months David didn’t walk with God, rather, he walked away. For 365 days David was no longer a friend of God, he was an enemy. Think about what was going through his head. He had sinned, and he knew it. After David spends a year living with the sin he had committed, God comes to him with a message. It is a message that is summarized with only four words: “YOU ARE THE MAN.”
 
From 2 Sam. 11:27-12:1, there seems to be a gap of about 12 months, a time where nothing is said about the sin David just committed. Just because nothing was said doesn’t mean everything was normal. After the awful sins David committed, God was silent. Why? I believe it was for two reasons:
 
  1. So that David could think on his sinful actions. Think about what was going on in his head. He had to live with the guilt of sleeping with another man’s wife and then killing her husband in secret. Every time David looked into the eyes of Bathsheba he was reminded. No one knew except David and Joab (the one David used to get Uriah killed in battle). After the sins were committed, David was left to think about his sin and David knew that God knew. He lived for a year knowing that God didn’t approve and was angry with him. God was silent so that the noise in David’s head could be heard.
  2. So that David would truly feel and experience the burden of his actions. Psalm 32 and 51 were both written after David had confessed his sin, but he writes about what his life was like (Psa. 32:3-4; 51:12). David was eaten up with guilt. He carried a weight that was destroying him and his life was void of hope and joy. God was silent so that David could think about what he had done and so that he could feel the weight of his sinful actions.
 
David chose to ignore his sin for a year, but that year was a time filled with stress and guilt. We can either fix the sin, or ignore it and face the consequences. If we ignore it and take God’s silence as a lack of punishment we WILL face the punishment that is promised on those who live in sin. We must choose the first course of action. 
How Not to Deal With Your Addiction 

How Not to Deal With Your Addiction 

Friday’s Column: Brent’s Biblical Bytes

Brent Pollard

Robert Aaron Long serves as a vivid example of how one should NOT deal with his addiction. While politicians and activists may seek to politicize the “massage parlor shooter’s” motives, law enforcement is painting the picture of a mentally disturbed man who seeks to justify the murder of others because of his sex addiction. Long evidently has a problem dealing with his lusts. Hence, these massage parlors’ existence, which he patronized in the past, presented such a temptation that he felt it necessary to kill the proprietors and workers of said establishments.   

 

As rationally thinking people, we readily see the problem with Long’s logic. Why would the perpetrator of the violence not turn his anger inwardly? He is the sinner, regardless of who the temptress may be. Would it not have been more effective to actually pluck out his eyes or remove other body parts causing him to sin? At least, one could twist Jesus’ hyperbole in Mark 9.34ff in such a fashion to justify self-mutilation for the sake of entering the Kingdom of God. If you seek to live righteously, would such extremes not be better than taking the life of eight people? 

 

If anything, this incident demonstrates the sad state in which our modern world finds itself. Long knew enough to realize he had a problem with his fleshly appetites. Had no one taught him to “flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart” (2 Timothy 2.22)? Had he pursued righteousness with others calling on God’s name, he would have learned how to “possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor” (1 Thessalonians 4.4 NASB1995). Older Christian brothers could have encouraged Long to exercise self-control (Titus 2.6).  

 

I cannot claim to know the particulars of Long’s home life, but I can inspect the fruit born of contemporary society (cf. Matthew 7.20). These types of crimes result from a nation that has excluded God from the public square. With God’s teachings, one notes that the one accountable for sin is the individual committing it (James 1.13-15). John identifies the three main avenues the world uses to tempt us: “lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life” (1 John 2.16 NASB1995).  

 

The correct application of the passage from Mark 9.34ff mentioned previously is that one takes personal responsibility in removing such influences. In the case of sex or pornography addiction, turn off the television and internet. Avoid the parts of town where more seedy businesses operate. Remove your libertine friends who desire to patronize things like strip clubs and “massage parlors.” As Paul indicates of his daily walk, it is self-discipline (1 Corinthians 9.24-27).  

 

And do not try to tackle addiction alone. Again, we observed that Paul told Timothy to flee lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace with other Christians. (2 Timothy 2.22) Addiction is difficult to overcome. The addicted can fall off the wagon periodically. Hence, he or she needs others to help lift them back up. We are mindful of the truth that “two are better than one” (Ecclesiastes 4.9-12). Join this truth with prayer and Bible study, and one can find the necessary strength to overcome. Isaiah reminds us that God gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. (Isaiah 40.29) 

Having seen how not to deal with your addiction, like Robert Aaron Long, decide to take responsibility, purge your life of the evil leaven, ask others for help, and turn to God for strength.  

 

Sources Consulted: 

Pagones, Stephanie. “Atlanta Shooting Suspect Tells Police Attacks Not Racially Motivated, Was Purportedly Driven by Sex Addiction.” Fox News, FOX News Network, 17 Mar. 2021, www.foxnews.com/us/atlanta-shooting-suspect-police-attacks-not-racially-motivated-sex-addiction.  

 

“Toying With God All My Life”

“Toying With God All My Life”

Monday’s Column: Neal At The Cross

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Neal Pollard

It was such a beautiful moment yesterday morning. A brother in Christ from our area who has been attending with us for a few months responded to the invitation. As Kevin and I took his confession, he spoke of sins in his past that fill him with regret. Though he was raised in the church, he has been away from the Lord for a long time. Among the things he expressed from his tender heart, he confessed, “Ive been toying with God all my life.” His point was simple. He felt doubt about God’s existence and concern for him, and it led him to make regrettable choices. But, recently, his study of God’s word and fellowship with God’s people led him to see how real God is and how much he needs Him in his life. 

I wonder how many of us could confess that, at times and in ways, we’ve toyed with God in some way. Perhaps we appealed to Him only when we were in trouble that we couldn’t solve ourselves. Maybe we promised Him we’d be faithful if only He’d give us something we specifically prayed for or thought we needed, and when we got it we broke our promise. It might have been a time or season when we “played church” and acted the role of Christian in the building but acted like the world when around them. 

This is not a tendency that started in our current generation. It is a human tendency. Bible writers exposed such thinking. God tells Ezekiel, “But as for you, son of man, your fellow citizens who talk about you by the walls and in the doorways of the houses, speak to one another, each to his brother, saying, ‘Come now and hear what the message is which comes forth from the Lord.’ They come to you as people come, and sit before you as My people and hear your words, but they do not do them, for they do the lustful desires expressed by their mouth, and their heart goes after their gain. Behold, you are to them like a sensual song by one who has a beautiful voice and plays well on an instrument; for they hear your words but they do not practice them” (Ezek. 33:30-32). This is similar to what Isaiah wrote (29:13) and Matthew (15:8-9) and Mark (7:6,7) quote. It’s playing with God to speak as though we desire His Word and even listen to it but be driven by desires and a heart that practice something different (cf. Jas. 1:21-25). 

I need to have the good heart our dear brother expressed on Sunday morning. One who wants others to see and know how much He believes in God, loves Him, and intends to serve Him. May we all keep our hearts tender to God’s Word and let its power do its surgical work in removing what doesn’t belong and moving us to act on what does belong. 

The Price Of Flight

The Price Of Flight

Tuesday’s Column: Dale Mail

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Dale Pollard

The cost of leaving God’s presence is more than many fully realize. 

It’s interesting how the phrase “away from the presence of the Lord” is used twice in Jonah 1:2-3. 

Leading up to the second mention, the text states that Jonah “paid the fare.” In the very next verse we read of a terrible storm that would end with the beginning of Jonah’s three day stent in solitary confinement within the belly of a great fish. 

He paid the fare— but the price was a little steeper than he thought. It’s expensive to flee from the presence of the Almighty. Too many Christians run away from the responsibilities that God has given us only to discover that the dark waters of sin and separation just aren’t worth it. 

Some discover this when it’s too late, but others are fortunate enough to realize this truth and return to the safety of God’s presence. May we learn from Jonah to go where the Lord leads and not make our own alternative routes. 

“But Jonah rose to flee to Tarshish from the presence of the Lord. He went down to Joppa and found a ship going to Tarshish. So he paid the fare and went down into it, to go with them to Tarshish, away from the presence of the Lord.” Jonah‬ ‭1:3‬ 

 
 
When My Love For Christ Grows Weak

When My Love For Christ Grows Weak

Thursday’s Column: Captain’s Blog

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Carl Pollard

A problem that each one of us as Christians face at one time or another, a problem that has been around since the establishment of the church, is the problem of a weakened love for Christ. This problem results from family crisis, various diseases, the death of a loved one despite our fervent prayers and crying out to God, different forms of persecution, or watching as a respected Christians loses his faith in God.
As Christians we will experience problems that will cause our love for Christ to fail.
Our faith and love for Christ are tied together as one. If you lose your faith, love is weakened and vice versa. The song, “When My Love for Christ Grow Weak” says this, “See His anguish, see His faith, Love triumphant still in death.” Love can be restored and faith can be strengthened if we would just dwell on the sacrificial love of Christ.
Since love is strengthened by increasing our faith in Christ, notice Revelation 2. The church in Ephesus had done well in many areas. They were hard working, patient, upright (they hated evil), noble minded (tested the claims of false prophets), they knew how to deal with evil men, and rather than growing weary, they persevered and had endurance (3). But they had one major issue…their love for Christ had grown weak.
Verse 4 tells us they were living the life of a Christian, but totally devoid of love. The Ephesians were doing a lot of good things, but out of obligation and duty rather than being properly motivated by a love for Christ. While they appeared to be righteous on the surface, they had no relationship with God. They were going through the motions but it was all done without love.
Sadly this is a problem that many face in the church today. They experience hardship and lose their love. They continue to live as a Christian out of duty and because it’s the “right thing to do.” Since the Ephesians fell into the same rut that we too can sometimes struggle with, it’s beneficial for us to look at what they were told to do in order to restore their relationship with Christ.
The solution is threefold. So let’s notice what we must do “when our love for Christ grows weak.”
Remember where you came from (Rev. 2:5). When our love for Christ grows weak, what must we do? Remember why you made the decision to become a Christian. Remember where you came from. A life filled with sin. A life devoid of hope. A time when you couldn’t call God your father. Remember the blessings of baptism. The sin that was wiped away. The relationship that was established with God, through Christ. Remember what you felt the moment you came out of the waters of baptism. The joy and relief in knowing that God now calls you HIS child. “When my love to Christ grows weak, When for deeper faith I seek, Then in thought I go to thee, Garden of Gethsemane.” Remember what makes our Christianity a reality. Remember what it cost for God to forgive your sin.
Repent (Rev. 2:5).  Metanoeson means “to change ones mind.” I want you to picture yourself in your car, you’re headed to lunch with the perfect restaurant picked out. As you’re getting closer, your wife says, “I’d rather go to Chick Fil A. Step 1, your wife has changed her mind about where she wants to eat. And so…Step 2, you turn the car around, you change directions and head to Chick Fil A…making the right call to keep your wife happy. That, is repentance. “A change of mind that leads to a change of direction.” The Ephesians were told to first, remember where they came from, and then to repent. Change direction, go back to a time when they had both good deeds and a love for a christ. A change of mind, from heartless service to love filled devotion.
Return and “Do the things you did at first” (Rev. 2:5). When Our Love For Christ Grows Weak, return to the way we were living before sin ruined our relationship with God. We must confess (admit the wrong) to God, and to each other (James. 5:17). Acknowledge the presence of sin. And change, even if it costs us. Each one of us can remember the times where our Christianity was strong and growing, but since we are human, it’s easy to become:
 Complacent (feeling satisfied with where we are, with no motivation to grow or change). Depressed (with current circumstances or personal trials).
Distracted (by work, family, hobbies, friends).
Emotionless (feeling so overwhelmed with sin that we just give up, lose hope).
There’s a cure for each one of these problems. Remember Christ. Dwell on the love that God has for each one of us.
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David’s Prayer In the Cave (Psalm 142)

David’s Prayer In the Cave (Psalm 142)

Thursday’s Column: Captain’s Blog

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Carl Pollard

It was in one of the lowest points in his life that David finds himself hiding in a cave praying to God. He says, “With my voice I cry out to the Lord; with my voice I plead for mercy to the Lord” (Psa.‬ ‭142:1‬).

David describes the circumstances that have caused him to feel discouraged. He says in verse 4, “Look to the right and see: there is none who takes notice of me; no refuge remains to me; no one cares for my soul.”

How often do we find ourselves feeling this same way? It could be the people we work with that don’t see the value of our Christianity. It could be friends at school pushing us to break our Christian values. It could even be our own families that don’t care for our souls.

David felt the loneliness of desertion with his own son, he felt betrayal from Saul, and he even willfully separated himself from God when he went after Bathsheba.

Many times we find ourselves in the cave. It could be that outside circumstances have put us there, or we sinned and are feeling the consequences of those choices.
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Put yourself in his shoes, hiding in a dark, desolate and damp cave feeling alone and deserted by everyone. Everyone except God. David never lost sight of God, and he knew that God would answer his prayer.

When we find ourselves in the dark, feeling deserted and alone, don’t lose sight of God. He will never turn His back on a struggling Christian. He cares for your soul.

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After Cuts Become Scars

After Cuts Become Scars

Neal Pollard

David was broken and battered by sin. He would feel its effects from his public life to his private life for the rest of his life. In the aftermath of his actions with Bathsheba and the subsequent cover-up, the wounds of sin left visible scars. Nathan’s accusing words perhaps ringing in his ears, he sits down to pen by inspiration the haunting, but hopeful, 51st Psalm. We often dwell more on the first part, the multifaceted description of sin and the more beautiful pictures of forgiveness. But, to me, the most beautiful part of the psalm is when David starts using the word “then.”

Satan would love for sin to defeat us. He would like the guilt to overwhelm us, to keep us from the restoration David longs for here. David is speaking prospectively, asking for a clean heart, renewed spirit, spiritual fellowship, joy and sustenance from God. But, he asks for it for a purpose. In doing so, he shows us what God wants to do with us and for us after our “cuts” become “scars.”

After the cuts become scars…

REACH OUT TO THE LOST (Psalm 51:13). On the other side of repentance, David was anxious to help others reeling from their spiritual wounds. As we overcome through God’s help, we can be a tool in His hand to relate to and rescue others struggling just like we did. It would be far better to have never gone down the road of sin, but having truly come back we can understand the desperate, dark place transgressors are walking. 

BE A FAITHFUL WORSHIPPER (Psalm 51:14). David, the master musician, had lost his song in the far country. He yearned for joyful song. Worship loses its power and purity in our lives when we are living in darkness. We feel hypocritical and empty, just going through the motions. But, back in His glorious light, we can experience that lifted up feeling once more. David shows us the blessing of restoration, a spirit renewed to enjoy further renewal in faithful worship.

GIVE GOD SACRIFICES (Psalm 51:15-17). David mentions the sacrifice of praise, a broken spirit, a broken and a contrite heart. It is obvious, from context, that these sacrifices would reveal themselves in his service to God and to others. This is not merely guilt-driven service, an effort to make amends for the evil influence of his sin. Having been made whole, David has a clarity of purpose that appreciates better what God wants from him. We can be fruitful and useful to Him, scars and all. 

ACCEPT GOD’S DELIGHT (Psalm 51:18-19). How many times did David relive those moments from the rooftop to the prophet’s visit? How often did he wish he could just go back and undo it all? How long did he wrestle with accepting God’s forgiveness and wondering if God could take him back? He shows an appreciation for the prospect of God’s delight. He rightly feels responsible for others, and he wants to lead them to do what’s right. But, I love what he anticipates. He knows God will be delighted with the offering.  Did you know that? Did you know that God can delight in you again, when you bring him your sin-scarred life and offer your righteous sacrifices? He doesn’t want to discard you. He wants to delight in you!

It must have continued to be hard for David. He had reminders everywhere. He could not undo his past. But, he did the right thing. Having dealt with his past, he focused on the present and looked to the future. That’s what God wants us to do after our cuts become scars!

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Deathbed Repentance?

Deathbed Repentance?

Neal Pollard

“From the stirrups to the ground,
Mercy I asked for, mercy I found”
That is a distorted view of grace,
Which seeks God only in death’s face.

It cheapens that which cost Him much,
To use Him only as a deathbed crutch.
Unlike the seeker at his eleventh hour,
Who sincerely reaches for His saving power,

The hardened sinner who in last resort
Hedges his bets for some eternal life support.
So many never reach a deathbed sound in mind,
Or care for His will ’til their death warrant’s signed.

While God is long-suffering, wanting all to be saved,
The majority spend their lives to sin’s power enslaved
They only think heaven when earth’s living is through,
But an afterthought gesture will just not do.

Scripture says “come now,” not “wait til tomorrow,”
So many delayed to their own regret and sorrow.
Instead of relegating God to a last-ditch recourse,
Submit to Him now, you He’ll publicly endorse.

Deathbed repentance is not found in His Word,
No matter what men from their wisdom you’ve heard.
Obey from the heart what His doctrine requires,
Let His word be your truth, let all others be liars.

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Biggest Misunderstandings About Public Responses

Biggest Misunderstandings About Public Responses

Neal Pollard

There are a couple of examples of public responses to the gospel message in the Bible, both in Acts.  One is positive and the other is negative.  As Peter was preaching that God has made Jesus Lord, the Pentecost crowd interrupted him with the question, “What shall we do?” (Acts 2:37).  As Stephen was delivering a similar message, his audience stopped listening and they cried out with a loud voice before putting the preacher to death (Acts 7:54ff).  Mention is made of a one another response that could apply to the corporate assembly, confessing sins (Jas. 5:16; 1 Jn. 1:9).  How public the setting was when Peter called for Simon to repent we do not know for certain (Acts 8:18-24).  So, why do we end our sermons with a call to publicly respond?  Is this simply borrowed from the denominations or is it just a rote tradition devoid of deeper purpose?

Often, we have explained the invitation as being an “expedient,” which I think it is.  When we speak of an “expedient,” we refer to a practice that is thought convenient, practical, suitable or appropriate but neutral (neither right nor wrong) and a-biblical (not found in the Bible but not unbiblical).  It is a sensible activity.  Hopefully, the sermon contains a call to change and is persuasive in nature.  Maybe, the person comes in the door that day convicted of his or her need to become a Christian or repent of public sin.  Affording a moment that makes it easy for one needing to obey Christ in one of these ways to do so is appropriate.

I have been in assemblies in this country and overseas that do not have such a time set aside or that do so at other times during the gathering—some do so at the beginning of the service so that a person can worship without being alienated from God (cf. Mat. 5:24), some invite anyone who needs to publicly respond to remain standing after the lesson and a song, some encourage people who need to respond to write their need on a card or piece of paper and hand it to an usher, the preacher, the elders, or someone designated to collect such communication.

While I think it is good for us to consider that there is more than one way to do this and that we are not mandated to do it at all in the assembly, I believe our current arrangement is a fine way to try and help people who need to make spiritual changes and improvements.   Yet, someone who feels the need to make such a response often hesitates or decides against it.  Certainly, the problem on such an occasion might be fear or delay, but is it ever due to some misunderstanding such a one has?  Here are a few of the biggest misunderstandings people have about responding to the invitation:

  •  Nobody but me is struggling with sin in their lives.  Truth: Romans 3:23.
  •  It is a sign of weakness to respond publicly.  Truth: Luke 15:10, 17
  •  Everybody will look down on me, judge me, or gossip about me if I respond.  Truth: Luke 15:28-32
  •  People will distance themselves from me if I respond.  Truth: 1 Corinthians 12:26-27.

Maybe you are thinking this or something similar.  May I assure you that every righteous person on earth and all the inhabitants of heaven would like nothing better than to help you be right with God.  Death and the Judgment loom, and we cannot let anything keep us from making proper preparation for them.  So, if you need to respond today or any day, won’t you come?

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