Tag: home

To Be Like Obed-Edom

Neal Pollard

When studying 2 Samuel 6, we most often reference Uzzah (or even Ahio or David). Yet, there is another man who we rarely talk about in that incident. After the failed and fatal attempt to move the ark of the Lord by ox cart, “David took it aside to the house of Obed-edom the Hittite” (10). The ark remained at his house for three months (11). Nothing is said of Obed-edom’s character per se. We know he was a Levitical gatekeeper (1 Chron. 15:18) and later appointed a minister of the ark (1 Chron. 16:5), but we are not told why he was appointed to these roles. As much as anything, it was likely a matter of ancestry.

But there is no mistaking what happens in those three months the ark resided in his house. Scripture says that “the Lord blessed Obed-edom and all his household” (2 Sam. 6:11b). Again, David reflects on the situation, with others affirming to him, “The Lord has blessed the house of Obed-edom and all that belongs to him, on account of the ark of God” (2 Sam. 6:12a). This news made the king glad (12b).

There are some encouraging truths gleaned from this brief notation in Scripture.

  • Blessed is the home where God’s presence is found (Psa. 128:1-4; Prov. 3:33; 14:11).
  • Scripture tells us that where the Lord is, there is not only blessing (2 Sam. 6:11-12), but peace (Num. 6:24-26), light (Psa. 36:9), refuge (Psa. 46:1), joy (Psa. 16:11), strength (Isa. 41:10), and freedom (2 Cor. 3:17).
  • Others are encouraged when they see the impact of God in our homes (cf. 1 Pet. 2:12; Acts 10:1-2).
  • The Lord actively works for good in our lives and even our possessions where He is the heart and center (Matt. 6:33).
  • When others see God doing good in our lives, they are encouraged to do good, too (Psa. 40:1-3).
  • We should be one whom others think to entrust with spiritual things–David chose Obed-Edom’s house (cf. 2 Tim. 2:2).

This account is not at all about Obed-edom as we have no further insight into his character. It is about the power of the presence of God in the home. God blesses and enhances every home where He is made to be at home. We bless everyone and everything in our home when God is firmly and visibly there! In this way, may we all strive to be like Obed-edom.

Honoring Our Aging Parents: A Sacred Duty

Brent takes a convicting look at the divine call to “honor” our parents as they get older:
“We should fully accept this privilege and dismiss contemporary “Corban” justifications, such as busyness, distance, or misaligned priorities. Looking after our parents goes beyond mere duty; it embodies the love of God that transcends generations….”

Brent Pollard

Have you ever considered the number of visits you have remaining with your elderly parents? If they are in their seventies and you only see them a few times a year, you could have less than 100 days to spend with them. This poignant reality, drawn from Psalm 90.12—“So teach us to number our days, That we may present to You a heart of wisdom” (NASB95)—compels us to value the limited moments we share with our parents.

Scripture emphasizes our obligation to honor our parents, which persists throughout their later years. The fifth commandment states, “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you.” (Exodus 20.12 NASB95). In Mark 7.9-13, Jesus emphasized this point by condemning the Pharisees for exploiting the “Corban” loophole, which allowed them to declare resources as dedicated to God to avoid providing support for their elderly parents. He emphasized that honoring parents is essential and cannot be compromised. Similarly, Paul states in 1 Timothy 5.4 (NASB95): “They must first learn to practice piety in regard to their own family and to make some return to their parents; for this is acceptable in the sight of God,” emphasizing that caring for parents is an expression of faithfulness.

What does “honor” signify as parents grow older? The Hebrew term kabab conveys a sense of weight and respect, manifesting in concrete actions such as dedicating time, resources, and presence. We carry a responsibility from the years they invested in us, a “return” that embodies appreciation and affection. Proverbs 23.22 (NASB95) states, “Listen to your father who begot you, And do not despise your mother when she is old,” as a reminder to cherish them even in their vulnerability.

Neglecting this duty has serious consequences. Harry Chapin’s “Cat’s in the Cradle” depicts a father who is too busy to care for his son, only to face the same neglect in old age: “My boy was just like me.” This cultural parable reflects a current crisis: loneliness among the elderly. Research indicates that one in three adults over 50 experiences regular feelings of isolation, which are associated with depression and an increased risk of premature death. Our presence can break the cycle, bringing joy and connection to those most needing it.

How can we fulfill this biblical call in our lives? Here are some practical steps to consider:

1. Prioritize Time: Schedule regular visits, calls, or video chats. Even short interactions can make a significant difference.

2. Offer Support: Assist with errands, medical needs, or financial issues. If you’re not nearby, consider arranging help through others.

3. Be Present: Make sure to invest time in hearing their stories and sharing your experiences with them. This action demonstrates that they continue to hold significance in your life.

4. Include Them: Invite them to family events to reinforce their place in your life.

5. Support Spiritually: Pray alongside them or encourage their faith, honoring their legacy.

We should fully accept this privilege and dismiss contemporary “Corban” justifications, such as busyness, distance, or misaligned priorities. Looking after our parents goes beyond mere duty; it embodies the love of God that transcends generations. As Paul cautions in 1 Timothy 5.8, failing to address this undermines our faith. Let us take action before time slips away and discover the blessings of embracing this sacred responsibility.

Encouragement

Travis Harrison

It’s not hard in today’s world to find things that discourage us. There are plenty of things that can bring us down. At times it really does feel like wherever we go, whatever we do, or say, there is something ready to discourage us. Unfortunately, people can be those roadblocks as well. That’s far from what we as Christians are called to do.

It was important in the days of the early church to encourage one another. So important that God commands it. It was important to God then – its important now.  Thankfully we have blessings such as the church and our church family to help us through those discouraging times. How do we go about finding ways to encourage each other? Is it the way we speak or how we live, or is it in our faith? Is it all the above? The fellowship we have with our friends, our family, along with worshipping and singing praises, and studying God’s Word are just a few. These are blessings that we receive when we meet together no doubt, but let’s not contain our encouragements just to the assembly. Our everyday lives are just as important and those around us everywhere need to feel encouraged regularly.  I just want to share briefly a few examples of what the Bible says about encouraging others and ways we can do just that.

Encouraging others is important, it’s necessary, it’s a command. Paul was one, if not the, most influential apostles of the first century church. He was a great teacher, preacher, mentor, and guess what? He was great at encouraging people. At the beginning of most of his letters he would begin with words of praise and thanks. (1 Thess. 1:2-3,) (Phil. 1:3-8,) (1 Cor. 1:4-5) are a few examples. In (Romans 1:12) Paul writes that he longs to be with them so that they can encourage one another in the faith. These types of encouragements were part of his everyday life.

We can’t discuss encouragement without mentioning Barnabas, the “son of encouragement.” He is mentioned several times in the New Testament, but he wasn’t a main character like Paul – he played a smaller, but still very important role.  Paul spent his early life persecuting Christians. The people of the first churches, as well as the disciples feared this man, and rightfully so. After he became a Christian, the disciples didn’t believe he was one of them, so what did Barnabas do? He encouraged Paul by standing up for him in Jerusalem (Acts 9:26-31). He was a fellow missionary with Paul, Mark, Titus, and others. He encouraged those in Antioch to remain faithful in the Lord with steadfast purpose, (Acts 11:23.) Paul and Barnabas visited these churches, they taught, and they lived out their teachings. They encouraged them in their works and through their faith. They instilled hope, strengthening the church’s faith. (1Thessalonians 5:11) – Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. We can all benefit from their examples. 

Let’s face it, life is hard at times. Certain situations bring us discouragement and can distort and change our thinking. Who wouldn’t want to be encouraged and uplifted in these hard times?  It might not seem like a big deal to some, but kind words of encouragement and praise could make all the difference in the world. (Proverbs 16:24) – Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body. (Proverbs 12:25) -Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad. We shouldn’t be surprised that little things like sending a card or giving a compliment, sending a text message, phone call or email, could make a big difference. How underrated but so appreciated those things can be!  It’s hard not to smile and be filled with some kind of encouragement if someone messages you to say they’ve missed you, and been thinking about you, been praying for you.  Check in on those you haven’t seen recently – Invite someone new to dinner – someone not typically in your crowd or someone new to the church. Practice hospitality as it says in (Romans 12:13.) Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor, (Romans 12:10.) 

When we encourage people we show our love, compassion, understanding, and we give them hope. It helps reset our minds, builds our confidence in each other, and allows us to see God more clearly. More than anything we are showing others how we live our faith just as Paul and Barnabas did. We show we want to be like Christ and people can see God through our actions towards them. Encouragement is powerful! Just remember that sometimes the smallest things can have the biggest impacts. 

Seeing Christ In The Family

Carl Pollard

Today’s families are falling apart. The home is divided, and God has been moved to the back burner. That is why now more than ever we should be able to see a difference in the Christian home, and the home that Christ is not in. 

If we can’t see a difference, how will the world ever change? If we can’t see a difference in our homes and the world, chances are we aren’t glorifying God. The family that Christ is in will have unique attributes that are difficult to come by in our society. The Family that glorifies God: 

Admits their sins. 

The ability to be open and honest about sins and failures results in accountability and change. Paul says in Romans 8:1, “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.” God has given us Christ as payment and He covers our sins, but we should be open and honest in order to find growth. Parents won’t be perfect and neither will children. Admitting sin to each other helps us to grow and change as a family.

The family that Christ is in: 

Is Gracious To Each Other

Once again this is a trait that is rarely seen in a worldly family. As a people who have found forgiveness through Christ, we must be gracious towards each other. The Bible teaches us that by the grace of God we can be forgiven and set free from the control and imprisonment to sin. With the freedom to confess sin comes the freedom to repent of it and seek God’s forgiveness. Knowing God’s forgiveness gives us the ability to ask and receive forgiveness from those we have sinned against. In the same way God has forgiven us, we should forgive each other. Sometimes it is those we hold dear and love that hurt us the most. Be forgiving. My brothers and I used to have plastic lightsaber fights, and we’d really get into it. It often ended in screams of pain and anger. Be forgiving to your siblings. Parents, be forgiving of your children. By doing so we will glorify God.

The family that Christ is in is: 

Ever Growing and Improving

Where there is spiritual life there is spiritual growth. No true Christian can remain the same. The Christian home is a place of constant spiritual growth. Every day we should do our best to glorify God even more. 

How can we glorify God in the family? How can we make Christ a part of our home? Deuteronomy 6:5 says, “You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.” Give yourself to God, be wholly devoted to Him, and watch as you, your spouse, and your children bring glory to the Most High God.

“Now The Sons Of Eli…”

Neal Pollard

After reading the beautiful story of a distressed, barren woman who was able to have a son and who dedicated him to the Lord (1 Samuel 1), we turn to the much darker, tragic story of the High Priest and judge of Israel, Eli, and his sons in 1 Samuel 2:11-36. We read of much better things of Hannah’s son, Samuel. He “was ministering before the Lord” (18). He “grew in the presence of the Lord” (21). Like Jesus in Luke 2:52, “Samuel continued to grow both in stature and in favor with the Lord and also with man” (26). But it was not like this with Hophni and Phineas. Notice how Scripture describes them in 1 Samuel two.

They were worthless (11). Literally, they were “sons of Belial.” This means worthlessness, wickedness, and good-for-nothing. It would be difficult to think of a more unfavorable way to be memorialized by God in scripture. Their deeds, which Scripture reveals, will show us why they are remembered this way. 

They were ignorant (11). More specifically, they were ignorant about the Lord. What irony! The men whose job it was to minister to the people on His behalf according to the law are described as those who “did not know the Lord.” The word “know” suggests to observe, realize, experience, recognize, be concerned about, and care about (Holladay 128-129). Merely going through the motions of worship and service does not guarantee that we know the God we serve. Hophni and Phineas did not!

They were sinful (17). This is a general assessment of their behavior among the people. “The sin of the young men was very great in the sight of the Lord.” They showed this by treating “the offering of the Lord with contempt.” It was holy, but they treated it as unholy! How audacious was their sin? “They lay with the women who were serving at the entrance to the tent of meeting” (22). Instead of reverently ministering to God, treating Him as holy at the time and place of worship, they were there committing fornication! 

They were obstinate (25). Their father, Eli, pleaded with them to repent. He admonished them, “but they would not listen to the voice of their father” (25). Is there a condition any worse than an unwillingness to listen to instruction? Truly, “a foolish son is destruction to his father” (Prov. 19:13). 

They were indulged (27-36). No doubt, Hophni and Phineas were “worthless,” but who did God make liable? Eli! God sent a rebuking prophet to him, not his sons (27). God charged Eli with “scorning” (“kicking,” NAS, NKJ) His sacrifices and offerings. He indulged himself and acted without self-control, and he left that example for his sons (29). It was tantamount to despising God (30). God promised judgment and destruction on his house. He was a poor example to his children, and he was responsible for their behavior. He was “unfaithful” in his duties (cf. 35). While they are grown by the time we read of them in 1 Samuel two, they obviously were not disciplined and trained as they should have been. God makes that clear.

Children are a legacy concerning our priorities, influence, and values. More often than not, they are a reflection of us. That can make us rejoice or regret. In Eli’s case, he would rue his sons’ actions to the day of his death (4:18). May we do all we can to esteem highly the Lord’s instructions for our homes (Prov. 22:6; Eph. 6:4)! 

The Root Of The Problem

Carl Pollard

In 1978, Thomas Hansen of Boulder, Colorado, sued his parents for $350,000 on grounds of “malpractice of parenting.” Mom and Dad had botched his upbringing so badly, he charged in his suit, that he would need years of costly psychiatric treatment.

I grew up in a family that was fully devoted to Christ. My parents created a home that in every way glorified God. The principles they taught us, the love my parents had for each other, the desire to love and serve God, were seen for as long as I can remember. They both helped create a God-fearing Home. Recently, my wife Emily and I had our first Child. He was born January 27th, and he is the cutest little chunk. I never thought babies were cute until Rich was born, and then everything changed. 

Having a child really makes you think about the future. It puts everything into perspective. 

I want to have a family that glorifies God. Mom and Dad both set the bar high, and I want to do the same for my own family. I want to glorify God through the way I love my spouse, the way I raise and teach my children, and through the influence we have on others. Glorifying God in the family is one of life’s greatest pursuits. Numerous verses teach us the importance of family, more specifically the importance of a family that glorifies our Father in heaven. 

The family was created by God. 

From the beginning Gods design has been one man and woman for life. Genesis 2:22-24, “The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.’ For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.”

A family unit is established by the joining of a husband and wife, and this is God’s design!

The only way for a family to glorify God is to accept and follow HIS design. Since the family was created by God, we need to recognize that we exist for the glory and purpose of God. 

God is speaking to the nation of Israel when He says this in Deuteronomy 6:2-3: “So that you and your son and your grandson might fear the LORD your God, to keep all His statutes and His commandments which I command you, all the days of your life, and that your days may be prolonged. “O Israel, you should listen and be careful to do it, that it may be well with you and that you may multiply greatly, just as the LORD, the God of your fathers, has promised you, in a land flowing with milk and honey.” 

The Israelites had a purpose for their family, fear God and keep His commandments. 

Notice that they kept these commands for their own good. God is the Designer of the family, and His commands will not only glorify Him, but will benefit us as well. Obeying God’s commands will result in a peaceful and unified family. Everything created by God exists to glorify Him; therefore, since God is the creator of the family, the family exists for His glory (Isaiah 43:7). 

Christian families are now in submission to His Son. Each person in the family is given a role in Christ and we do so to the Glory of God. Glorifying God in the family is essential because the family was created by God. 

But the question is how? How do we glorify God in the family? Very simply, we glorify God by fulfilling our purpose. We can bring glory to God if we obey His commands. We don’t have to guess what or how to bring Honor to Him. We just need to fulfill our purpose. Sadly, the world today has twisted and perverted the home. Many struggle in their relationships with family members, and children grow up in a divided home. Now more than ever, we should be showing the world what a God fearing home can achieve. The Goal of the family is to be unified in submission to God. 

If we will return to fearing God in our homes, the world will become a better place.

WHY STAY MARRIED?

Monday’s Column: Neal At The Cross

Neal Pollard

Caitlin Flanagan wrote an article in TIME magazine entitled, “Why Marriage Matters.”  She begins by saying, “Buffeted by affairs and ennui, the intact, two-parent family is under assault. What America needs to get over its commitment issues. (Hint: it isn’t love)” (7/13/09, p. 45).  What was so fascinating about the article was that, whether sociologists, feminists, domestic policy-makers, or other experts, they all came to the groundbreaking conclusion that children are healthier, more successful, and more productive who come from intact, two-parent homes.  Flanagan kept returning to that conclusion, even as high profile cases of infidelity were offered to show how the guilty were selfishly putting their own ideals and needs about what their families truly needed.

While I believe that it is possible for a marriage to grow more romantic, satisfying, and enjoyable each and every day of one’s married life, such is a tangible benefit of the hard work and effort invested in marriage.  It is neither automatic nor an entitlement.  It is not to be “persevered” or patronized only so long as I am having a good time, get my way, or reap the “rewards” of it as I, subjectively, decide I should.  No doubt, God created marriage to provide companionship and suitable help (Gen. 2:18ff) and a legitimate sexual outlet (1 Cor. 7:1ff).  It is enriching and even thrilling to look back over years of partnership and see in one’s spouse the depth of intimacy built by shared time and experience.  God certainly depicts a loving, close relationship in marriage as the ideal toward which to be striven (Song of Solomon, Eph. 5:22-33; 1 Pet. 3:1-7).  However, first and last, marriage is a lifelong commitment, an ongoing fulfillment of a vow made to and before God Himself, and a relationship that can be severed with God’s approval only under extreme circumstances.

Flanagan had so much good to say about marital partners considering how vital their staying married means to raising well-adjusted, optimally-functioning children.  She hits the nail on the head regarding the deep-seated, lasting negative effects of divorce upon families and, ultimately, society.  Yet, while it may only be a matter of semantics, I disagree with her premise.  Staying married is about love.  It is about knowing how to love, God’s way, and intentionally, intensely, and indefinitely, nurturing and growing that love in the marriage.  Love involves duty, but it is so much more than that.  It is an act of the will more than a flutter of the heart. Yet, its payoff for marriage gives a man and a woman a lifelong glimmer of light that burns brighter even as the lights of our own lives gradually dim.  Let us love our spouses with biblical love and watch the seismic effects for good upon the home, the church, and the culture!

Homesick For Heaven

Thursday’s Column: Captain’s Blog

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Carl Pollard
The definition of homesick is “experiencing a longing for one’s home during a period of absence from it.” It’s the feeling a college student experiences in their first few months away from home. It’s a desire to get back to the people you love and to be back in a familiar place. Whether it’s a business trip that takes you away for extended periods of time or even a vacation, that feeling of opening the door and being back home is amazing.
 
We sometimes sing a song in worship that speaks of this longing. “I’m kind of homesick for a country. To which I’ve never been before..” How can we long for a place we’ve never been? This is a homesickness like no other. It’s unique in that the desire to be there is based on the descriptions of heaven we read in scripture.
 
We are to long for heaven more than our earthly home. How can we do this? “No sad goodbyes, will there be spoken. For time won’t matter anymore.” Aren’t you homesick for a place without goodbyes? A time when we will never have to stand over the coffin of a loved one again. A place where cancer and sickness can’t take our loved ones away. Heaven is a home where we will never have to experience the pain and grief that comes from death.
 
Paul writes in 1 Corinthians‬ ‭15:53-55‬, “For this perishable body must put on the imperishable, and this mortal body must put on immortality. When the perishable puts on the imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to pass the saying that is written: “Death is swallowed up in victory.” “O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?”” For too long death has won. For too long people have felt the pain that death brings. But one day, death will be swallowed up. No longer will death be able to torment us. Our eternal home will be a place free of death. There won’t be any funeral homes, graveyards, or hospitals because heaven is a place where no one will ever die again. I’m homesick for a place I’ve never been because in that wonderful home we will never say goodbye.
 
I’m homesick for a place I’ve never been.
Are you?
 
 

There’s No Place Like Home!

Tuesday Column: Dale Mail

Dale Pollard

There is so much debate out there as to what Heaven will actually be like. Some make the argument that we just can’t know for sure. We know that there will be no tears in Heaven, so since that is the case there will definitely be blackened catfish there. Because in a place where there is no blackened catfish present, I would cry. Now with that out of the way, let’s look at three quick promises about Heaven.
First there is the promise of “fellowship” In Revelation 21:3 it says, “He will dwell among us…” Not just any fellowship, but fellowship with Jesus Christ. The second promise is that of “Relief.” In the very next verse it says, “God shall wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.” How many of us can’t wait for that day? Now the third promise is one that is pulled from a verse that many people do not like to read. In Revelation 21:8 we see that there is a promise of “seclusion” You see, Heaven is going to be so great because of who will not be there. After we get a glimpse of what is promised to those who love Him (James 1:12), we see what is promised to those that don’t. Yet even here we see a blessing. Heaven is going to be place that is absent of, “…the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars…” Heaven is going to be a place filled with family. The faithful Church family. I’m going to Heaven! It’s a choice. It’s a choice to live right and follow Christ no matter what. You have the ability to say it confidently and you should never have to wonder if you’re going to Heaven. It’s a promise! Take hold of that promise, because it’s the only thing that matters.

My First Sermon

Neal Pollard

My dad was holding a gospel meeting somewhere in the Carolinas and he asked me to preach the Sunday evening sermon of the week he was gone. It was April 12, 1987, and I was a Junior at Bradwell Institute (high school) in Hinesville, Georgia. He gave me one of his sermons and I basically, with little change, got up and preached it. I remember being scared out of my mind. I had no formal training (which is obvious from the grammar and pronunciation). Afterward, the congregation flooded me with compliments, which says everything about them and nothing about my abilities. But, it encouraged me. It helped solidify my desire to preach and became the foundation for my willingness to go preach around the area over the next year-plus (preaching in such places as Glennville, Jesup, and Brunswick, GA). It led me to choose Faulkner University, to major in Bible and meet great preachers and teachers like Wendell Winkler, Ken Randolph, Carl Cheatham, Leonard Johnson, Eris Benson, Donnie Hilliard, and others. My family led me to believe that gospel preaching was an honorable, important occupation. So did the Hinesville church of Christ, on that occasion and subsequent ones. So did brethren in those places where I filled in.

What an important lesson for families and congregations today! Paul asks some questions of eternal consequence: “How then will they call on Him in whom they have not believed? How will they believe in Him whom they have not heard? And how will they hear without a preacher? How will they preach unless they are sent? Just as it is written, “HOW BEAUTIFUL ARE THE FEET OF THOSE WHO BRING GOOD NEWS OF GOOD THINGS!” (Romans 10:14-15).  I pray that more adults will send a clear message to young men: preaching is important, respectable, and valuable! It should be considered as an option exercised by normal and even talented and intelligent individuals.

We’ve been engaged in full-time ministry for 28-plus years, and it has blessed our lives tremendously! It’s thrilling to watch our three sons giving themselves to that life, too. Let’s send more preachers!

(It’s hard for me to listen to, but it should encourage anyone who says, “I don’t have any talent for preaching!”)

“Father’s Table Grace”

Monday’s Column: “Neal At The Cross”

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Neal Pollard

In 1960, Otho Jones and Homer L. Sewell wrote a song made popular by Flatt and Scruggs. It’s a song written from the point of view of a man’s oldest son, a son who felt he was old enough to be on his own and leave home. He describes his father as simple and not filled with a formal education, but also as one very devout and the spiritual leader of his home. He describes himself as “young and foolish.” When I listen to this song, I think about the way I could be as a teenager and how I tried my parents’ patience. My dad, a gospel preacher since 1964, has always been a diligent praying man. While I never heard him say these words in my presence, I wonder if he ever prayed them about me in my younger days.

“Our gracious heavenly father we all gathered here today
To give the things for blessings so humble we pray
My oldest son is leaving but I’m sure he knows what’s best
But just in case would you stand by and help him stand the test

Lord he’s awful neglectful about church on Sunday morn
And if he gets with a wrong crowd would you let him hold your arm
And if he flies too high would you clip his wings
But don’t let him fall too hard, I’m sure you can handle things

I’ve tried my best from day to day to teach him right from wrong
And he’s grown to be a fine young man and he always blessed our home
We pray dear Lord for guidance that he won’t build upon the sand
But I won’t worry half as much if I know he’s in your hands

And oh yes Lord it won’t be long till I’ll be coming home
Don’t make me wait too long
We pray dear Lord for guidance please cleanse us from our sins
So we can all be together in heaven in Jesus name amen.”

Those words are neither perfectly autobiographical nor an apt description of my dad (who has much more formal education than I do). But I think a lot of parents who continue to labor over their children in prayer, concerned for their safety as they turn them loose in this world. However large the physical or financial threats may be, what should concern us most are the spiritual ones. We will never outgrow our concern for them. We should never stop being the right kind of example to them. May we never sin against them by failing to pray for them. They need us to be the type of Christians described by James, of whom he writes, “The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much” (Jas. 5:16). 

Why Is A Generation Leaving Religion?

Neal Pollard

Pew Research Center recently revealed that “Four in ten millennials (those, according to this source, currently between 23 and 38) now say they are religiously unaffiliated”(fivethirtyeight.com). The data seems to indicate that “today’s younger generations may be leaving religion for good” (ibid.). A contemporary study put out by the American Enterprise Institute reveals at least three reasons why: (1) They didn’t have strong religious ties growing up, (2) Their spouses are more likely to be nonreligious, and (3) They feel religious institutions are not relevant for shaping the morality and religion (or nonreligion) of their children. Parental example, dating choices, and biblical literacy and faith, then, are major drivers in this discussion. 

Those polled revealed their thinking. A majority felt that religious people are less tolerant of others, less informed or even intelligent than their secular counterparts, and less necessary for shaping their family’s moral viewpoints. At least, reading this one study and the authors’ interpretation, it seems that leaving church is a deliberate lifestyle choice of people who at least sometimes are encouraged out the door by poor examples of faith. 

Notice the startling closing paragraph of the article, which states,

Of course, millennials’ religious trajectory isn’t set in stone — they may yet become more religious as they age. But it’s easier to return to something familiar later in life than to try something completely new. And if millennials don’t return to religion and instead begin raising a new generation with no religious background, the gulf between religious and secular America may grow even deeper (“Millennials Are Leaving Religion And Not Coming Back,” 12/12/19, Cox, Daniel, and Amelia Thompson-DeVeaux). 

I found it important to share those findings for these reasons:

  • It is a matter of crisis. People abandoning God’s Word and will is foreboding (Judges 2:10ff; 2 Timothy 3:1ff; 4:3-4; 2 Peter 3:3ff). It is happening, and it must matter to us. It does to God. 
  • It is a matter of correction. The home can change course if it is on the broad way. Individual Christians can improve their ethics and morality in public (Ephesians 4:25ff). Soul-conscious Christians can make the most of our opportunities to share Jesus in Christlike fashion (2 Timothy 2:24-26). We must change what we can change. 
  • It is a matter of consequence. A culture does not get where ours currently is as the result of sincere devotion to Christ and His Word. Hosea 4:6 is incredibly relevant. The law of sowing and reaping is immutable, for good and bad (Galatians 6:7-8). Whatever we exalt as guide is leading us somewhere.
  • It is a matter of courage. The only way I can see for this to change is for you and me to not just believe something or hold a conviction. The early Christians didn’t confine their faith to the holy huddles of the assemblies. They stood up for Jesus every day and every way. 

Two of my three sons are millennials and the third is only a couple of years too young to qualify. This is, largely, their generation. They and their faithful Christian peers are faced with reaching them, and they need our help. Talk to them and have honest conversation about how to raise your effectiveness together in stopping and reversing this exodus. This is not about preserving a comfortable lifestyle, which is threatened by sin (Proverbs 14:34). This is about preserving souls, which will face Jesus some day (Matthew 25:31ff). 

Walking Away

Teachers’ Aids

Neal Pollard

Several of our classes have assistants to the Bible class teacher.  She (or perhaps in select cases “he”) serves in a support role, helping students do handwork, find Bible verses, or occasionally keep order.  These are vital roles, and often a teacher’s aid later actually becomes a teacher.  Teachers’ aids are part of a great team and education system that benefits everyone in the classroom.

There is a constant, pressing need for more teachers’ aids.  I don’t mean in the actual classroom during the “Bible class hour.”  These aids are needed Sunday afternoons, late Wednesdays, Saturday afternoons, and/or opportune moments between these times.  These aids have even more power than those helping the teacher in the classroom.  They are the parents and care-givers of the students.  There are several ways they can “aid” the teachers who put in hours of preparation time and tons of energy and emotion into the task of teaching.

Aid teachers by making sure your children do their homework.  Most teachers give homework, memory work or activity sheets.  This is a vital supplement to the actual lesson taught in class.  When children come to class with their homework done, teachers are elated and made to feel that their efforts are appreciated.  They feel that their students take the class as seriously as they do.

Aid teachers by asking about what they have learned.  Ask your children what they talked about in class that day.  Ask them to review as much as they can.  Ask them what they learned and how they can make application from the class.  What better topic of conversation can parents and children discuss on the way home from services?

Aid teachers by making sure they feel appreciated.  One way to do this is by making sure you practice the first two suggestions.  However, having the child send a thank you note or by personally thanking your child’s teacher, you are aiding through the means of encouragement.  Everyone likes to feel appreciated.  Teachers are no different.

The qualifications are simple enough.  To be this type of teacher’s aid, simply do all you can to partner with the efforts of your children’s teachers.  Your child, your home, and your child’s teacher all will be blessed by it.

teacher-talking-with-students

Homesick

 

Neal Pollard

This time of year our minds go back
To days gone by, down memory’s track
Of laughter, stories, food and walks
Singing, sharing family history and talks

Some who once were in our clannish stable
Have left our banquets for the heavenly table
Childhood recollections may be larger than life
And death or loss may cut like the proverbial knife

Football played on the lawn or watched on the screen
Presents opened and distant relatives seen
For the blessed, much spiritual guidance and contemplation
And talk of our hope and our common anticipation

Do you miss those times of hearth or home?
Or revel in its prospect, when kids and kin soon will come?
Are you in the company of those Scripture upholds?
Those who desire a better country, with streets of clear gold?

Who are longing for a room in the Father’s house?
To bask in the Light that no tears can ever douse?
To stroll the banks by the gentle River Of Life,
A place of happiness, joy, peace, but no strife.

A place full of family, both known or which we meet
Of those we met in Scripture or those who made our lives sweet?
Are you longing for something far better than here,
Where sight replaces faith, where peace tramples fear?

Is your life centered around new heavens, new earth
Where righteousness dwells, only those of the new birth?
Do you long for what happens after being put in the ground
The home of the soul where eternity is found?

Let’s long for and live for that heavenly land
Where we’ll see God’s dear face and hold Jesus’ hand.

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Thanksgiving 1994, at Gary and Brenda Pollard’s house (baby is Gary)

Jane Roe/Norma McCorvey

Neal Pollard

She was used by pro-abortion and pro-life groups, but in fairness nobody outdid Norma McCorvey at trying to use others for personal advantage. Her effort to abort her third child, in Texas in 1970, was the case used to go to the Supreme Court. By the time the appeals process wound up in legalizing abortion at the federal level, her baby was almost three years old and in the home of adoptive parents. She was the product of neglect and horrible abuse, was promiscuous, bisexual—though mostly lesbian, and was known to try to make her way by hook or crook for most of her life. She tried to leverage her infamy into financial advantage or at least a living wage.

It’s wonderful to see that this tormented woman publicly changed her position regarding the right and sanctity of the unborn, but her home life and adult life symbolize the growing immorality stemming from a breakdown in the home. A father fairly well abandoned his role in the home. Alcohol and drugs complicated and clouded the decisions and thinking within the home. Sexual immorality created multiple problems. Sin was perpetuated from poor examples there (The Washington Post, Emily Langer, 2/18/17).

Pew Research found that 46% of “U.S. kids younger than 18 years of age are living in a home with two married heterosexual parents in their first marriage. This is a marked change from 1960, when 73% of children fit this description, and 1980, when 61% did” (Gretchen Livingston, 12/22/14). This is only part of the story. I know of several scripturally divorced and remarried couples, with blended families, who have raised righteous, believing children. But, the general breakdown of the home is at the heart of so many of society’s woes.

The foregoing is far from revelatory. Sermons, articles, and Bible classes have trumpeted it for years. What I see in our broken society is endless opportunity. It will require patience, time, and lots of love, but homes like the one McCorvey grew up in and the one she attempted herself are craving what only Christ can supply—fulfillment, joy, peace, and direction. That is where you and I come in. Let us remember what we’ve been told by God: “But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for God’s own possession, so that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light” (1 Pet. 2:9). Let’s be shining!

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FORGOTTEN FRUIT

Neal Pollard

Paul especially urges a particular quality that seems rarer these days. However, this is not a trait disappearing only with those in the world, but one that seems harder for us who claim to be disciples of Christ. He uses a word in Galatians 5:23, Ephesians 4:2, Colossians 3:12, and 1 Timothy 6:11, among others—James does, too (1:21; 3:13). The word, πραΰτης, means “gentleness of attitude and behavior, in contrast with harshness in one’s dealings with others” (Louw-Nida, Greek-English Lexicon, 1996, n. pag.). They suggest the word includes “always speaking softly to or not raising one’s voice” (ibid.). Another Lexicon, in defining the word, speaks to what may prevent one demonstrating gentleness, namely “…being overly impressed by a sense of one’s self-importance” (Arndt, Danker, et al, 2000, n. pag.). Yet, surely there are other impediments to our bearing the fruit of gentleness.

We struggle to be gentle, don’t we?

  • With our children’s weaknesses and mistakes.
  • When responding to our spouse, whether in impatience or aggravation.
  • With rude fellow-shoppers, incompetent cashiers, or pokey or inattentive drivers.
  • Being at odds with a brother or sister in Christ in a clash of personalities or purposes.
  • Having thoughtless or rude neighbors.
  • Engaging in a disagreement with a faceless, nominal acquaintance on social media.
  • Dealing with customer service, especially if we get an ESL representative.

This is just a sampling of situations which tempt us to abandon a gentle spirit. Aristotle called this quality “the middle standing between two extremes, getting angry without reason…and not getting angry at all” (Zhodiates, Dictionary, 2000, n. pag.). The New Testament does not tell the Christian that we cannot defend ourselves, protect our rights, or get what we pay for, for example. But, in addressing concerns, needs, and problems, how we do this makes all the difference.

For many of us, gentleness needs to be intentional. It doesn’t come naturally.  We need to pray about it, prepare ourselves for it, and practice it. Our passion needs to be harnessed. Our speech needs to be tempered. Just making the need for gentleness a conscious priority in our lives will greatly improve our performance, with family, friends, brethren, and strangers. It is a powerful tool to win hearts and shape lives, beginning with our own.

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Giving Away Your Wedding Ring

Neal Pollard

Brooklin Yazzle, a Mesa, Arizona, wife and mother, apparently handed out her wedding ring with the Halloween candy last week.  She had taken off her ring and put it in a candy jar to help her children carve pumpkins.  Later, things got hectic and she absentmindedly dumped her ring along with the candy into a candy bag to give to children.  Complicating things, among her treats were plastic rings.  She has made an appeal through the news to get it back, stating that while it isn’t worth much monetarily it has great sentimental value (FOX News).

Many of us can relate to such a mindless blunder.  To my everlasting chagrin, I lost my wife’s High School class ring back while we were dating (she married me anyway!).  It is not uncommon for a person to remove their wedding ring to work or play, but removing it in such cases is to protect it from harm or loss.

The American Community Survey and the Daily Beast collaborated to provide a list of the “Divorce Capitals of the U.S.”  The ignominious top ten list, from “top” to bottom, is: (1) Panama City, FL, (2) Sierra Vista, AZ, (3) Charleston, WV, (4) Medford, OR, (5) Reno, NV, (6) Deltona, FL, (7) Pueblo, CO, (8) Palm Bay, FL, (9) Jacksonville, FL, and (10) Grand Junction, CO. In six states, the divorce rate is between 12.64-14.35% per 1,000 people, age 15 and older (Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Kentucky, Maine, and Oklahoma). Yet, the best of states still average 6.05-7.65% (Ashley Reich, The Huffington Post, 11/4/13).

This survey is but an example of a trend that is only tempered by a falling marriage rate, as more and more couples are living together without the sanctity of marriage. It shows that the dissolution of marriage is not confined to one area of the country, or more like in a “Red” or “Blue” state.  Are there steps we can take to keep our wedding rings?

  • Spend time together.
  • Have shared interests.
  • Focus on pleasing your spouse more than being pleased by him/her.
  • Make marriage a priority, not an afterthought or a “no thought.”
  • Make spiritual investments together (devotions, prayer, serving, etc.).
  • Spend time with couples whose marriages are healthy and happy.
  • Practice hospitality together.
  • Keep romance alive.
  • Keep Christ King of your home.
  • Avoid pettiness.

This list is not exhaustive, but it already gives all of us areas to work on and improve in.  We should remember God’s feelings, who said, “I hate divorce” (Mal. 2:16). Let’s hold on to our wedding rings!

CLIMATE CHANGE

Neal Pollard

Perhaps you were aware that New York is hosting the United Nations Climate Summit, a gathering of a staggering 162 nations to talk about the environment and such specific issues as global warming.  While you may find the attendance impressive but the “facts” not so much, this event shows how important the topic of climate change is to some important people—presidents, heads of state, prime ministers, and the like.  The Associated Press fact-checked our president’s speech about efforts he is making and found it wanting in some areas, but there is no questioning that this issue is a high priority to him (Joby Warwic, The Washington Post, 9/24/14).

The big question often swirling around this controversial topic is, “How do you effect climate change?”  What works and what does not? What can be impacted and what is inevitable?  What can one person (or even one nation) do?

Our earth is not the only entity or sphere with a “climate.”  Inasmuch as the word relates to not only the weather, meaning also “the prevailing attitudes, standards, or environmental conditions of a group, period, or place” (“climate.” Dictionary.com Unabridged. Random House, Inc. 24 Sep. 2014. <Dictionary.com) and synonymous with “mood, atmosphere, spirit, tone, and temper” (ibid.), we should give attention to the other areas of life that involve a “climate.”  Our marriages, homes, and congregations each have a climate.  While we may enjoy certain things about each of these organizations, they also each inevitably stand in need of at least some changes.

What can we do to effect climate changes in those all-important areas?  The knee-jerk answer might be to tell the leaders what we think it takes to improve, to advise, criticize, and push.  That may seem like a good way to do things, but experience teaches that these are the least effective ways to promote change.  Do you know the best way?  Be the climate change you want to see!  Many of us find ourselves operating in all three arenas—spouses, parents or children, and church members.  That means each of us have at least one place to primarily concentrate, and that is on our individual role in those spheres.  Can you change your demeanor, attitude, level of effort and involvement, or assistance to the others in that group?

For all of us, it is easier to start with the other person(s) and size up what they need to do.  That’s worse than a hoax! That’s self-delusion.  Far better it is to apply this principle and “Test yourselves to see if you are in the faith; examine yourselves! Or do you not recognize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you-unless indeed you fail the test?” (2 Cor. 13:5, emph. mine). There’s the way to meaningful “climate change”!

 

Climate Change