Tag: happiness

Be A “Bro”

Be A “Bro”

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Tuesday’s Column: Dale Mail

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Dale Pollard

Cages lined the back of the pet store. The noise was headache-inducing as the pack of dogs howled and barked in excitement. I wasn’t in the market for a dog that day but I’ve always enjoyed walking into pet stores and being around them. Their happiness and joyful nature is just contagious. It’s hard not to smile at the sight of wagging tails and their high energy. In a world that is saturated with pessimism and depression, these animals seem to give us moments of peace. The day I walked into the store it just happened to be adoption day and that meant at least one certainty— Pits. Big and potentially aggressive muscular breeds that scare most people. I’m not particularly afraid of them, but my apartment couldn’t handle a fury tank like that. At first, it seemed like every kennel had some kind of Pitbull-mix inside but not the last one. This rusty colored little dog wasn’t barking or wagging his tail. He was tucked up against the back corner not making a sound. I opened the gate and crouched down and timidly he poked his head out and placed his paw on my lap. That was the one! I named him “Bro” and he’s been exactly that for the last five years. He has been the source of much laughter and happiness in my life. So I don’t care how ridiculous this sounds, but I pray for him often. 

Be an optimist. It spreads like a wildfire and we have much to be optimistic about. If you need a reminder, I suggest reading Romans 8. The whole chapter serves as a reminder to every faithful Christian that we should eagerly await that future Glory. My short summary of the chapter doesn’t do it justice because there’s a lot packed into it. If the world is getting you down and you struggle with keeping your head up— read it. Paul will give you some detailed reasons why you should be happier than a dog with its head stuck in a peanut butter jar. 

A Joyful Heart

A Joyful Heart

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Friday’s Column: Brent’s Bent

Brent Pollard

Physician and sociologist Nickolas Christakis tracked 5,000 people over 20 years and discovered what most of us likely suspected, that surrounding ourselves with cheery people makes us happier. Happiness is contagious.1 And though this should cause us to carefully choose our associates (1 Corinthians 15.33), it should likewise motivate us to be that one spreading the joy. 

Solomon wrote, “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones” (Proverbs 17.22 NASB1995). I have often received this medicine, including my most recent visit to interventional radiology to have a surgical drain placed in an abscess. One of the nurses in the radiology department is named Andre, and I have had the pleasure of receiving his care on multiple occasions. 

Last November, when hospitalized for the same purpose of draining abscesses, Andre was the one who came to fetch me and carry me to radiology. You could hear Andre singing before he arrived. He helped me into a wheelchair, and we took things routinely until we reached a long, empty corridor. Then, suddenly, Andre started making the noises of a race car, and we went flying through the halls. As we turned corners, Andre would screech as if he had to brake hard to keep us from crashing. 

Andre had to fetch my father from the waiting room during my latest visit. Upon arriving at the waiting room, he asked those seated if they’d rather hear him imitate Bing Crosby or Elvis Presley. Their choice must have been Elvis Presley because he played Elvis on his smartphone and danced as he brought dad to my bedside. Then, he pointed at my hot-blooded sideburns, which he mistook for pork chops, and said, “See, Elvis.” 

It is hard to feel anxious or afraid about your procedure when such a friendly fellow has you grinning from ear to ear. It is also hard not to like Andre. It reminds me of what interpersonal relationships, even with strangers, could be if we sought what edified others rather than divisiveness (Romans 14.19).  

Had we wanted, we could have focused on our differences. For example, Andre has more melanin in his skin while I have less. Perhaps that has led to Andre developing a different worldview. I acknowledge that this may have caused Andre to experience things I have not, wholly negative things. But Andre did not act as if that were a factor in our interactions. Things like politics or socioeconomic differences were not a consideration. Instead, Andre and I interacted as two people made in God’s image. He treated me in a manner consistent with how he desired me to treat him (Matthew 7.12).    

Paul tells us to look out for the interests of others (Philippians 2.4). We likely take this to mean that we should focus more on meeting physical needs like hunger or spiritual needs through evangelism. However, I suggest that sometimes the best way to look after another’s interest is to smile at them and share your joy (Galatians 5.22). I admit that we cannot all be extroverts to the degree of Andre, but we can still spread the joy we feel to others. 

Sources Cited 

1 Arley, Dan. “Beware: Happiness Is Contagious.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, 11 June 2009, www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/predictably-irrational/200906/beware-happiness-is-contagious. 

Peace On Earth?

Peace On Earth?

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Tuesday’s Column: Dale Mail

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Dale Pollard

Peace on earth? Is that even possible? I mean boy look at this place. 

Could it be that peace and joy mean something else entirely? 

It’s true that for the faithful Christian peace and joy await us, but there are some who believe we can only experience these blessings in heaven. 

  1. We may feel that we are allowed only moments of Joy. 
  2. History shows us only times of peace, but never peace everywhere.

Can we have peace and joy for our life here on earth? 

Let’s look at how this is most definitely possible. Perhaps it’ll make the holiday season that much more enjoyable and hopefully every day after. 

 Real PEACE 

  1. Peace is not the lack of war— we know we’re in a spiritual battle (2 Cor. 10:3-5)
  2. We can have peace knowing that Jesus already won the ultimate war of death and gave us the victory.
  3. Peace comes from confidence in your salvation (Romans 8:31-38) 
  4. God is on our side. He’s bigger than any problem we will ever face— peace comes from knowing what many assume to be the unknown.

Real JOY 

What is joy? 

  1. It’s not happiness 
  2. Like peace, it relies on an understanding of faith and and the appreciation of victory. 
  3. It’s also a conscious awareness that God is active in our lives. James 1:2 says, “Count it all joy!” That doesn’t mean when trials tumble in you embrace them with a smile, but it’s an awareness that God is working in the world and that He has everything under control.

What’s there to be joyous about?

  1. If you’re a faithful Child of God— there’s everything to be joyous about. Your life is one of abundant joy, but you may just need to choose it.
  2. Decide how you will view future trials ahead of time. Now is a great time at the beginning of a new year. 

These are God’s gifts to you that keep on giving— all year long. 

Peace to you and may this new year be the one we all decide to be joyful about the certainty we share in a world full of uncertainty. 

Making My Lot A Lot Better 

Making My Lot A Lot Better 

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Monday’s Column: Dale Mail

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Dale Pollard

Nothing makes a problem bigger like feeling discontent.
Nothing makes the future dimmer like being discontent.
Nothing buys you happiness, no matter the money spent. 
It breeds greed and disappointment, and above all— the discontent. 

According to Psych Central, discontentment leads to some unhealthy ways of coping with anxiety and depression. It can lead us on a never ending chase of those fleeting and euphoric moments which always leave one feeling empty inside. 

Paul would pen the words, “…I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content” (Phil. 4:11b).

He writes to the church at Philippi, from prison. Paul was no stranger to being wrongly charged as a criminal. He spent several nights behind bars throughout his life, but from Philippians 1:20  he seems to know that his time on earth is coming to an end. 

The Romans were notorious for finding the most creative ways of torturing their victims before their final execution and Paul preaches the gospel of a Man who was crucified for His ministry. The agonizing thoughts of a similar death had to have entered into the apostle’s mind. Though the details of his anxieties are not recorded, what is recorded is the awe-inspiring language he uses to describe the kind of faith he owns. He is unafraid of death; he even seems to welcome it! 

In the gloom of a prison cell where there was no doubt a melancholy atmosphere about him, Paul’s mind is thinking on those things which are true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, and commendable. This mindset has led him to be content and at peace. His contentment remained the same regardless of the bleak outside circumstances. 

His life teaches us three basic truths about contentment: 

  1. Anyone can be content through anything— at any time. 
  2. Contentment is a recognized and willful dependence on God.
  3. It is something that has to be LEARNED (4:11).

Being a prisoner of Rome had some negative social stigmas, just as it does today. Timothy even struggled with Paul’s imprisonment, so what made the church at Philippi listen to his letter from behind bars? Paul’s unshakable faith and commitment to the work of Christ had to play a part in inspiring them. A lifestyle that can offer hope and peace that nobody and nothing can take from us— speaks for itself. Paul demonstrates the power of Christ at work in him to the church at Philippi, and to every congregation that’s ever existed since then. 

We have everything we need but don’t deserve because of Jesus— let’s be content. 

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The Foundation For Happiness

The Foundation For Happiness

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Thursday’s Column: Carlnormous Comments

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Carl Pollard

Do you want to be happy? In answering this question, many in the church will tell you to “fulfill your purpose.” While this is true, serving God and proclaim Him to others will bring happiness, there’s a very important foundation that is a driving point for our Christianity.
 
While it is true that we have been given the opportunity to tell others about the gospel, and we no longer have to worry about what we should be doing with our lives, what happens if we try to fulfill this command without love?
 
True happiness is built on the foundation of loving God. Now before you start thinking that this is one of those “easier said than done” articles, notice a few verses with me. Just saying that we love God won’t bring happiness. We must have a true sacrificial love for Him. To help us make this goal more attainable we must ask ourselves, “Why do I love God?”
 
I Love God because…
 
He deserves to be loved. Think of all the ways He has blessed us. Forgiveness, Heaven, and every earthly blessing we have. God deserves to be loved by His creation, but even more than that,,,
 
He commanded us to love Him. “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might” (Deuteronomy‬ ‭6:5‬).
 
Loving God isn’t a suggestion. If we claim to be His children, we must love Him the way He has told us to love Him. This means we love Him with all our:
 
Heart (center of emotion). It is not only an external action, but an internal affection that influences all our actions. He wants a heart so filled with love that it is shown in secret as well as in public.
 
Soul. The immortal part of our being is thoroughly filled with a love for God. It’s deeper than the physical.
 
Might. Our thoughts, speech and actions should all be influenced by a love for God.
 
Loving God means we love others. In Matthew 22:37-39, Jesus quotes Deuteronomy 6:5. “And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
 
Not only do we love God with every aspect of our being, but we love those created in His image. Jesus goes on to say that all of the law and the prophets hangs on these two commands.
 
We serve God because we love Him. We fulfill our purpose because every part of our being is consumed with a love for God. Do you want to be happy? Love God, love His creation. Build a foundation of love and your faith and service to God will have no limits
I Want To Be Happy

I Want To Be Happy

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Thursday’s Column: Carlnormous Comments

carl-pic

Carl Pollard

I was 16 years old and I remember thinking, I’ll be happy when I get a new phone. I was 17 years old and I told myself, I’ll be happy when I get my own vehicle. I was 18 and I remember thinking, I’ll be happy when I get a newer phone. I was 19 and I thought, I’ll be happy when I get a newer truck.

At 16 I got a new phone and I was happy, until I dropped it in a hotel toilet a month later. I was 17 and I got my own truck and I was happy, until the transmission went out on the way to school. I was 18 and I got a newer phone, and I was happy until I left it on the roof of my dads car as we drove home from church. I was 19 and I got a truck that was nicer than anything I could ever want. I was happy, until it broke down on an Indian reservation in Arizona.

I thought I knew what would make me happy. I chased after the physical possessions that I thought would bring me joy. The problem that I failed to see was that phones break and trucks aren’t always reliable. My happiness would run out when my stuff would break.

People are constantly searching for happiness. Why? Because they don’t know what will make them truly happy. It’s a daily experiment that never gives them the result they are looking for. There are millions of books, movies, articles, and lessons geared toward helping us find true happiness.

“How to be happy” is one of the most searched phrases on Google, second only to “how to lose weight.” We ask this question because we can’t find the answer. Solomon asked this question in Ecclesiastes. “Vanity of vanities. All is vanity says the preacher.” The wisest man in the world wanted happiness and looked at every possible solution. He looked to money, drinking, and women. Every time Solomon placed his happiness in these things, he was left feeling empty. He finally found the secret to life: “The end of the matter; all has been heard. Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man” (Ecc. 12:13).

Every earthly option was tried, and none of them seemed to work. The bottom line is to fear God and keep His commandments. Why? Because God knows His creation. Do you struggle with finding happiness? Do you want nothing more than to be content? The answer isn’t found in the world. You won’t find true, lasting happiness in anything on this earth.

Happiness is found in our purpose as God’s chosen (1 Peter 2:9), in loving God (Deut. 6:5, Matt. 22:37-39), and in showing gratitude (Psa. 118:1; 136:1; 147:7).

Spirituality Needs to Find Its Expression

Spirituality Needs to Find Its Expression

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Friday’s Column: Supplemental Strength

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Brent Pollard 

In the waning days of the last millennium, I happened to catch a program on public television about a dance competition held by Native Americans in rural Connecticut. If you are wondering why I still remember that show some 20 years later, it was because of the responses given by some of those interviewed. The dancers participating expressed the idea that their dance was an outward expression of their inward spirituality. The master of ceremonies echoed their sentiments as he explained spirituality needs to find expression. Ponder that last part with me for a moment; spirituality needs to find expression. Indeed.

I’m not suggesting that we incorporate carnal expressions of our spirituality in our worship of God, like dancing to a beating drum. Yet, if we are spiritual, shouldn’t there be an outward expression of it? Christians have a magnificent treasure stored within themselves (cf. 2 Corinthians 4.7). Sometimes, though, observation of Christians suggests otherwise. We who are blessed still covet for more. We who are given joy from within have sour attitudes. We allow ourselves to become filled with anxiety. Our brethren anger us, rather than receiving our love. Those without the church may think we are sad rather than happy. We who serve the One owning all withhold the bounty of that Providence and Wisdom of His Revelation from those needing it. We fail to be lights shining in a dark world as we are commanded (Matthew 5.14-16).

Yes, spirituality needs to find its expression. Can you recall the depth of emotion you felt when you first realized you were in love? You wanted to proclaim your love in loud tones to any who would listen. Do you remember the joy and zeal that was yours when you put on Christ in baptism? You wanted to proclaim the praises of Him Who had brought change to your life. Why don’t we allow our faith to find its expression today through the sharing of the Gospel? Why not do good to all, especially to those of the household of faith, as we have the opportunity? (Galatians 6.10) Lastly, let us worship God in spirit and truth without being begged to do so by elders, preachers, and Bible class teachers. If we do these things, no one will doubt the spirituality we claim to possess.

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Why Do We Sigh?

Why Do We Sigh?

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Friday’s Column: Supplemental Strength

brent 2020

Brent Pollard

 I was watching a program from Japan in which the protagonist sighed. We can relate to sighing. I know I may find myself sighing quite a bit. (One researcher noted we all sigh about every 5 minutes. 1) In this program, however, another person, walking by, cautioned the protagonist not to sigh since that allowed happiness to escape. Later, I observed another Japanese show where the same idea was expressed. I know the Japanese have proverbs and idioms, but I’ve yet to locate the source for that expression. I presume it’s a cultural thing since it’s the only context in which I’ve seen it expressed.

 Why do we sigh?   A sigh serves as a reset, both physically and mentally, for the body. 2 As such, it’s an important biological function. Yet, we likewise tend to sigh when we’re frustrated. In fact, that seems to be when we become aware of our sighs. For this reason, most people interpret sighing with negative emotions. 3 If I sighed while we’re having a “vigorous discussion,” you might conclude I’m angry with or didn’t like you. However, the heated exchange might have simply stressed me, triggering a sigh to release the pent-up anxiety.

Despite being commanded to be “anxious for nothing” (Philippians 4.6), we’ve already observed people do sigh. Obviously, if we sigh every 5 minutes, our sighs cannot always be about anxiety. Yet, it remains amazing God provided for a means of regulating excess anxiety through that rush of relaxation one receives by sighing. This, is of course, in addition to the inconceivable peace received from prayer (Philippians 4.6-7). It may be that with one’s sigh, he is refocused upon his task. Thus, a burden is momentarily laid aside so one can get a better grasp of it to carry it further to the goal.

Jesus told us not to worry, but He also said each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6.33-34). One should try to practice mindfulness in connection with his faith. Since we do notice our sighs of frustration and anxiety more often, we ought to allow our sigh to signal us concerning our stress and take the appropriate measures to resolve it. If a sigh is prompted by a person, either you forbear (tolerate—NASB) them in love (Ephesians 4.2), or you talk to them about the troubling matter privately (Matthew 18.15-17; Acts 18.24-28).  If a sigh is because we feel we’re a failure, let us remember the sufficiency of God’s grace (2 Corinthians 12.9). By walking in the Light, we have the continuous cleansing of Jesus’ blood (1 John 1.7). And if someone we’ve tried to reach with the Gospel frustrates us, after we’ve delivered ourselves of bloodguilt (Ezekiel 3.17-19), let us recall the sad truth that only a few find the narrow way (Matthew 7.13-14). Our sigh may be a sign that it is time to knock the sand from our sandals and move on (Luke 9.5).

Yes, rather than serving to remind him of something negative, a Christian’s sigh might also serve as an opportunity, an opportunity to reset his faith.

 

References

1 Heid, Markham. “3 Reasons You Sigh So Much.” Prevention, Hearst Magazine Media, Inc, 11 June 2019, www.prevention.com/health/a20508517/why-you-sigh-so-much/.

2 Lewis, Jordan Gaines. “Why Do We Sigh?” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, LLC., 10 Apr. 2013, www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/brain-babble/201304/why-do-we-sigh.

3 ibid

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The Quality That Makes Us Excited For Hard Times

The Quality That Makes Us Excited For Hard Times

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Wednesday’s Column: Third’s Words

Gary III

Gary Pollard

Joy is something we’re supposed to have when we go through trials (Jas. 1.3). It’s χαρά, which means, “to experience gladness.” It describes a forward-thinking mentality that says, “Right now isn’t great, but I can learn from this and grow.” Our joy comes from anticipating the ultimate growth we experience from conquering trials! And if those trials take my life, that joy is in anticipation of heaven. 

Joy is something experienced in heaven and in the presence of angels when someone repents (Luke 15.7, 10). It is compared to the excitement one feels when regaining something valuable that had been lost. Joy is more than just contentment;  it contains also an element of excitement. 

Joy is a fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5.22). It is contrasted with outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, etc. A part of living the Christian life, denying our primal desires, and not being boastful is having joy. Sometimes we find ourselves focusing on what we give up to live faithful lives, but we forget that Christianity provides for, encourages, and promotes excitement and joy! 

So what are we supposed to be excited for? Paul even had joy in the face of suffering (Phil. 2.17). Joy and happiness are not necessarily the same thing. We can have joy or gladness or excitement concerning the life that waits for a Christian while living in the sometimes harsh realities of a fallen world. 

In this life, Christians can have joy because of a profound sense of purpose, having meaning in a confusing world, healing after tragedy, and something to always look forward to. 

It may not be our first response to be excited about hard times, but if we develop a mindset that looks to the rewards and positives of difficulty (growth, endurance, empathy, perspective, heaven), we will have joy and excitement. 

Carl and Chip

A Lot Happens In 25 Years!

A Lot Happens In 25 Years!

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Neal Pollard

Today is Kathy’s and my Silver Anniversary. The day we got married, the president was the first George Bush. Johnny Carson was hosting the Tonight Show (his final show was on our wedding night). Gas was barely over a dollar per gallon. We lived in a sleepy, west Alabama town (the thought of living in either Virginia or Colorado and traveling overseas was nearly as unthinkable as the internet). In some ways, of course, it seems like longer ago than 25 years, but in others it seems like yesterday.  But, you learn a lot along the way—some lessons coming easy but others more difficult.  In 25 years of marriage, here are a few things you learn.

  • You inevitably face some huge tests. There’s pain, tears, and fears, but, with God’s help, they are tests you can pass. While there can be abiding happiness, it does not come without adversity.
  • The road takes unanticipated turns. You are glad you cannot see the future, but that it comes to you only one day at a time. Taken all in all, you would not change the journey.
  • You must guard your heart and your life. The devil does not want couples to stay married, happily or otherwise. You can be drawn away (Jas. 1:13-15), and others can attempt to lure you away from your mate (Prov. 5:15-23). The hearts of married people can become polluted as easily as anyone else’s (Mark 7:21-23). You must guard your heart at all times (Prov. 4:23).
  • Trust is sexy. Untrustworthy behavior, deception, lying, broken promises, etc., is so damaging to a relationship. However, a spouse with a trustworthy character helps create a climate of peace, security, and confidence. This translates to attractiveness. We want those we feel close to. Distrust prevents intimacy.
  • The journey truly grows sweeter. With every change and new phase, there are challenges, losses, and adjustments. But the cumulative intimacy, the battle scars, the moments and memories, the happy days, the sweet surprises, and the rest combine to make an exciting, satisfying journey. Knowing a person better and deeper day after day makes life better, and brings poignancy to the heavenly insight, “It is not good for the man to be alone, I will make him a helper suitable for him” (Gen. 2:18; cf. 1 Cor. 11:8-12).
  • The little things are big things. Opening a door, an arm around the shoulder, unloading the dishwasher, love notes, flowers, putting lids up and down, noticing changes in hairstyles and nail polish, appreciating a meal, cleaning up after yourself, and similar “little things” can promote or undermine the overall quality of married life. Life is made up mostly of “little things.”
  • Of all your common interests, nothing compares to serving Christ together. Actions and activities done in service to Him contain better super glue than any hobby, vacation, life event, or mutual interest. Whether hospitality, evangelism, mission work, devotions and worship, Bible study, and such, these shore up the marital foundation and form an incredible, common bond.

Every day requires more practice, persistence, and prayer. Both of us are constantly changing and, hopefully, growing. It’s vital to stay in tune and in touch. But, I count Kathy as the greatest blessing after my soul’s salvation. I shudder to think where I might be without her and thank God that she has been by my side for a quarter of a century. My fervent prayer is that God will continue to bless my days with her heart, mind, and the rest of her and continue to bless my life through her as He has since I met her in August of 1990. My desire is to do my best to reciprocate these very things for her. May He grant me the ability to do so. Happy Anniversary to my favorite writer, my Sweet Pea, my Kathy!

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My dad was one year older than I am today in this picture (taken 5/22/92).