Tag: neighbor

Loving Difficult People

Nick Dubree

If I asked for a show of hands if you had at least one person in your life that you found difficult to love, some of us, if not all of us would have both hands and both feet in the air. There is no doubt that all of us have people in our lives that are “difficult to love.” This is a natural part of our lives and even more so as followers of Christ because we have different standard of “loving people” than what you find in the world.

I want to dive a little deeper than what usually talk about when this topic comes up. Usually, when he hear this topic, our minds selfishly start pointing blame at others. We may have thoughts like, “Well if they would just have the same opinion as me, everything would be better”, or “man I wish they would get their life together, they’d be a lot easier to be  around.” 

However, when we observe Matthew and Mark’s account of what Jesus says to the Pharisees in Matthew 22:36-40 and Mark 12:29-31, we find that when Jesus is asked “Which is the greatest commandment?” He says “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind. And the second is like it, You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”.

There is a greater context here, but I find it very interesting that when Jesus is asked this question, even though it’s coming from a Lawyer trying to test Him, of all the commandments, Jesus answers with these two. Obviously Jesus find these to be greatly important. First and foremost, you have to Love God. Second, you have to love your neighbor as yourself.

And if we do a little reverse psychology with the second commandment Jesus mentions here, you gotta love your neighbor. To love your neighbor right, you gotta love your neighbor as yourself. To love your neighbor as yourself, you gotta love yourself.

Webster defines the word difficult as -hard to do, make, or carry out; hard to deal with, hard to manage, overcome, or understand. Loving difficult people is……difficult, but loving yourself is a constant challenge. It’s a lifelong battle. If we were honest with ourselves, our disappointment and or disapproval of others originate with that of ourselves. The first step to loving difficult people. In fact, loving yourself is the first step to loving people in general.

Jesus gave us a reason to love ourselves, not in a selfish, prideful way, but in light of our salvation. Our salvation and hope should shine through in love for others. I believe if we study ourselves on a regular basis, cultivating that love that Jesus has shown us, it will bring forth a spirit of natural love for people, no matter how difficult they may be.

Who Is Our Neighbor?

Caden Hammer

This past weekend, a group of us college students traveled to Sneedville, Tennessee, to do service work. Lauren Ritter and her home congregation have a long-standing relationship with the community of Sneedville and have done a lot of outreach over the years. At the young adult’s retreat, Lauren suggested a group of us could go do a project there. Sneedville is a poor community in Appalachia with low access to running water, employment, and education opportunities. Along with delivering groceries to local families, we took on a large project of building a wooden platform and placing a 500-gallon water tank on it to give a family access to water. I am very grateful to have been involved in the project, and have reflected on the experience a lot over the last several days. 

If you would go ahead and turn your Bibles to Mark chapter 12, verse 28. In the verses before this, Jesus has been questioned by the Pharisees and Sadducees who were trying to trip him up and get him to make a mistake in his answers. In verse 28 they ask him another question. Starting in verse 28 it says, “And one of the scribes came up and heard them disputing with one another, and seeing that he answered them well, asked him, Which commandment is the most important of all? Jesus answered, The most important is, Hear O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. There is no other commandment greater than these.” 

The first thing we have to figure out in these verses is, Who is our neighbor and how do we love them as ourselves? Well, Jesus gives us the answer in Luke 10. Jesus is talking to a lawyer who wants to know how to be saved. The lawyer already knows that he is supposed to love his neighbor as himself, but like a lot of us he isn’t sure who his neighbor is or how to love them that way. The lawyer asks in Luke 10 verse 29, “And who is my neighbor?” Jesus then responds by telling the parable of the good Samaritan, which most have us have heard plenty of times. While we have all heard this parable and know what it says, I’m not sure we really understand the significance of it. The person who helped the man was supposed to be an enemy of him. They were supposed to hate each other. They were completely different, yet the Samaritan was the one who chose to help. Jesus then asked the lawyer at the end of the parable, “Who was the neighbor to the man who fell among the robbers?” and the man understood that it was the Samaritan. The lawyer Jesus was talking to understood what exactly that parable meant and what he was supposed to do. But do we? Do we understand that our neighbor isn’t just our friends or people we go to church with, or people that look like us, or act like us, or people we think are cool? While those people are also our neighbors, the people Jesus focuses on are the people that are the most different from us. Just look at the people that Jesus talked to the most. The sinful woman in Luke chapter 7. He ate with tax collectors in Mark chapter 2. He touched the bleeding woman in Mark chapter 5. He drank water from the woman at the well in John chapter 4. These people were either completely different than him or hated by everyone else in the community. Yet these are the people that Jesus chose to be with. We tend to look down on people that are different than us, but Jesus says that loving them as ourselves is the second greatest command only behind loving God.  When we learn to love like Jesus it opens our eyes to see people for who and what they really are: a soul that is precious to God. The good Samaritan helped the man not knowing anything about him, his past, his work history, his family situation, or if he would be receptive to the Gospel.  If we learn to love people like this, it will change us. 

While this past weekend was focused on providing for physical needs, we should never forget the greatest need of all is spiritual. Loving people with no strings attached and forming relationships eventually allows people to be receptive to what good news you have to offer.  When they see you love them as you love yourself, they know you want what is best for them. Jesus told his disciples to go into all the world preaching the gospel. There are people all over the world and in our communities who have never had someone show love to them the way Jesus loves and to point them to Him. This weekend really opened my eyes to this.  While these people look and live much differently than I do, their needs are no different than mine, and they are no less loved by God.  Learning how to step outside our comfort zones and love and serve people will provide opportunities to share the gospel.  

The finished product: installed water tank for the family in need

Thoughts On Love (I)

Gary Pollard

I’ve been studying the nature of Christian love recently. I try to study where my knowledge is insufficient or personal character is lacking. It has been difficult for me to love others the way Jesus loved others. I still have a long way to go. Other people can be unlovable, and threats are to be dealt with! This is the perhaps one of the more common baselines of human thought. 

Jesus calls us to transcend these primal dispositions and pursue a truly selfless love. We have many obstacles to overcome in our pursuit of the kind of love Jesus shows. The idea of “love of self” has been perverted by the world. We’ve all seen a saying that goes something like, “You can’t love others unless you love yourself.” While the underlying motive behind that saying may have been pure, it has been used to justify narcissistic tendencies or excuse bad behavior. 

But what if I genuinely don’t love myself? How can I love my neighbor like I love myself if I don’t feel anything (or very little) positive about myself? Our understanding of biblical love may need to change a little. In all of scripture (and even in apocryphal and pseudepigraphal writings), love for our neighbors almost always translates to providing for their needs. 

A person may not love self, but they will not starve their bodies out of hatred (remember, an exception by its nature is not the rule; a rule is something so often true that it is reliably predictable). They will not neglect the basic functions of being just because their view of self is not completely perfect. 

Love does not necessarily have anything to do with how we feel about a person. It is sometimes called “the strongest emotion” but this is not completely accurate. There is an emotional aspect to love, often described as σπλαγχνον (splanknon, compassion) or οικτιρμος (oiktirmos, heartfelt pity), though this is not exhaustive. But αγαπη love is a decision to help another person, despite how we might feel about them. 

What does biblical love look like? If we love our neighbor, we’ll feed them when they’re hungry, encourage or give affirmation when they need it, help them financially (anonymously, if we want to avoid God’s judgment), give grace to their weaknesses and mistakes, and overlook hurtful actions done to us. 

Who are our neighbors? Our enemies, our friends, and everyone else who lives on this planet. More realistically, any other human in our proximity. If we see a need and have the ability to help, godly love compels us to help. When Jesus comes back he will ask, “Did you take care of my people?” So much more could be said about this, but next week we will look at the kind of love God wants us to have for him. 

Love Your Neighbor

Gary Pollard

Jesus told a story about a Jewish man who was attacked while traveling. He was seriously injured and left for dead by the side of the road. Two of his own countrymen — considered spiritual leaders by their people — completely ignored their unconscious brother and went about their day. A Samaritan man — considered inferior by the Jews at that time — helped him. He didn’t say, “I hope everything works out for you.” He rendered medical aid, took him to shelter, and made sure he had everything he needed to recover. 

The conclusion of this story was a question: “Which one of these three men do you think was really a neighbor to the man who was hurt by the robbers?” The answer was obvious. Loving your neighbor (i.e. other humans) necessarily means providing for their physical needs. How important is this? “Teacher, what do I have to do to get eternal life?” The Good Samaritan illustration was Jesus’s answer to that question. 

“When we have the opportunity to do good to anyone, we should do it. But we should give special attention to those who are in the family of believers” (Gal 6.10). 

“My brothers and sisters, if a person claims to have faith but does nothing, that faith is worth nothing. Faith like that cannot save anyone. Suppose a brother or sister in Christ comes to you in need of clothes or something to eat. You say to them, ‘Go peacefully, warm yourself and find some food,’ but you don’t give them the things they need. If you don’t help them, your words are worthless” (Js 3.14-16). 

“Suppose a believer who is rich enough to have all the necessities of life sees a fellow believer who is poor and does not have even basic needs. What if the rich believer does not help the poor one? Then it is clear that God’s love is not in that person’s heart. My children, our love should not be only words and talk. No, our love must be real. We must show our love by the things we do” (I Jn 3.17-18). 

“The Son of Man will come again with divine greatness, and all his angels will come with him. He will sit as king on his great and glorious throne. All the people of the world will be gathered before him. Then he will separate everyone into two groups. It will be like a shepherd separating his sheep from his goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.Then the king will say to the godly people on his right, ‘Come, my Father has great blessings for you. The kingdom he promised is now yours. It has been prepared for you since the world was made. It is yours because when I was hungry, you gave me food to eat. When I was thirsty, you gave me something to drink. When I had no place to stay, you welcomed me into your home. When I was without clothes, you gave me something to wear. When I was sick, you cared for me. When I was in prison, you came to visit me’” (Mt 25.31-36).