Our Words Reveal Us

Neal Pollard

I was recently checking the customer reviews for an upcoming hotel stay.  The reviews were from verified members of the hotel club of that particular chain.  74% of the raters gave it the highest possible rating, but it was interesting to read the remarks of the smattering of people who ranked it poorly.  One said, “I’d rather drive an extra 30 miles than stay at this hotel. The staff is impossible to deal with.” Another put, “This hotel is nothing more than regular. Expect nothing great for a high price. Bad choice for the night of your wedding.”  A third wrote, “Very overpriced for quality of accommodations. Mold in bathroom, poor upkeep, poor bed quality. Would not recommend this hotel.”  Surrounding these aberrations are gushing reviews overflowing with superlative words like “by far the best,” “amazing,” “could not have asked for better,” “very happy,” “very clean,” etc.  My best guess is that somebody did something to upset the “exceptions” or, as experience has shown, the guests may not have handled themselves well and helped matters escalated.

Here is something that is certain.  So often, our complaints, angry words, unrestrained speech, and foul mood reveals far more about who we are than the object of our disgruntlement.  Two people could receive the same customer service and react completely differently.  Two aggravated people express themselves totally unlike one another.  The waitstaff may be lacking at a restaurant, and one encourages while another berates.  A teacher may have a bad day and one student might sympathize while another brutalizes.

Paul urged Colosse, “Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one” (Col. 4:6).  This is said in the context of evangelism, though the principle prevails in all our interactions.  The late Wendell Winkler often said, “If you are not kind, you are the wrong kind.”  Are we cognizant of the power of our tongues to heal or kill (Pro. 18:21)?  Jesus says, “But those things which proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and they defile a man” (Mat. 15:18).  More than once, my parents admonished me in my formative years to “watch my mouth!” What sage advice for grown-ups, too! We might think we have good hearts, but our words reveal who we really are!

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