Stop Complaining!

Carl Pollard

 Very rarely do people seek out complainers to be their friend. It can be a challenge to spend any length of time around that person who is constantly grumbling and complaining about everything. At the same time, becoming a chronic complainer isn’t all that hard. Our society is filled with discontent people. Everyone has complaints. It seems that the more we are blessed the more we complain. Why are we so quick to complain? It’s human nature, but society still labels this as a negative trait. 

I read a story about a cowboy that was driving down a dirt road, his dog riding in back of the pickup truck, his horse in the trailer behind. He failed to negotiate a curve and had a terrible accident. Sometime later, a highway patrol officer came on the scene.

The officer saw the horse first. Seeing how badly hurt it was, he drew his revolver and put the animal out of his misery. He walked around the accident and found the dog, also hurt critically. He hated to see it in so much pain, so he ended the dog’s suffering as well.

Finally he located the cowboy –who suffered multiple fractures–off in the weeds. “Hey, are you okay?” the cop asked. 

The cowboy took one look at the smoking revolver in the trooper’s hand and quickly replied, “Never felt better!”

Sometimes it’s in our best interest to keep our complaints to ourselves. Mark twain once said, “Don’t complain and talk about all your problems–80 percent of people don’t care; the other 20 percent will think you deserve them.” Problem is, it can be difficult to refrain from complaining. We want sympathy, we desire compassion, often we don’t even realize when we complain. 

I used to think I wasn’t a chronic complainer, which is true to an extent. I made a mental note of how many times I said something negative in a day…and well here’s an article that hopefully will help you as well as me. 

Maybe you struggle with being negative; honestly I believe we all complain to a certain extent. In Philippians 2:14-16 Paul writes this letter as a call for unity in the church at Philippi. Right off the bat he starts talking about how blessed he is…to be in prison. He acknowledges his dire circumstances, but even after being wrongly imprisoned for 4 years, all he talks about is the gift he has been given to suffer for the cause of Christ. 

If anyone had the right to complain, Paul had every right in our eyes. Why does Paul say all of this? 

In chapter 2 he tells us to imitate the mind of Christ. Followed immediately by 14-16, “Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain.” 

According to Paul, it is impossible for us to focus on the will of God if all we do is grumble and complain. How can we keep our eye on the example of Christ if all we do is talk about everything that is wrong. 

I know our country is a mess, the church as a whole is divided, and people are more self-centered than ever. But, and I say this kindly, “who cares?” God has given us His Son, the gift of eternal life, and a family. I know there is a lot to complain about, but ultimately God cannot use us if thats all we do. There are a couple of key words mentioned in the text that we need to define. “Grumbling” the Greek word literally means, “utterances made in a low tone of voice.” Context defines whether these are satisfied or dissatisfied grumbles. The way Paul uses it is in a negative light. Also known as “murmuring.” “Complaining” (disputing) is a word that is best translated as arguing or disputing. 

So, Paul tells us to do all things without complaining and arguing. God expects us to be a joyful people. And we have no excuse! Let’s stop complaining.

An Attitude Of Gratitude

Saturday’s Column: Learning From Lehman

Justin Lohden

Gratefulness is defined as warm and deep appreciation for kindness received; gratitude or thankfulness. Something that my family has to work on continually is an attitude of gratefulness. In today’s world, teaching our children gratefulness can sometimes be challenging not only for them but also for us. Have you ever met individuals who constantly complain and seem ungrateful? More specifically, have you ever met Christians who constantly complain and seem ungrateful? I would dare to say most of us try to avoid certain people because you know they are probably going to be complaining about something. Regarding church, do you ever catch yourself complaining about elders’ decisions, something the preacher might have said, or the temperature in the church building? I know I do sometimes! So, what causes a spirit of complaining or ungratefulness? Could it be a lack of faith? Maybe selfishness? In my opinion, they both can cause ungratefulness. For example, we have several accounts in the Old Testament of the Israelites complaining! In Numbers 21:5 we read, They spoke against God and against Moses, and said, “Why have you brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? There is no bread! There is no water! And we detest this miserable food!” God had just delivered them Egyptian bondage and they still showed a lack of faith and ungratefulness.

Sometimes our selfishness can create an attitude of ungratefulness. We sometimes just want our way or want more and more which can lead to a complaining or ungrateful attitude. There’s no doubt God has blessed our country economically but sometimes that may lead to contentment problems. We have to be careful not to fall in the trap of wanting more and more. Contentment can help produce gratefulness. Paul tells us in Philippians 4:11-12, “Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content:  I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.” We know that Paul was in prison when he wrote this. Can you imagine being in prison and speaking of contentment? Then what about us? Surely, we can learn to be content and grateful for the things that we have by Paul’s example.

On top of everything else God doesn’t seem to be a big fan of complaining nor did He take it lightly. In Numbers 11:1 we read, “And the people complained in the hearing of the LORD about their misfortunes, and when the LORD heard it, his anger was kindled, and the fire of the LORD burned among them and consumed some outlying parts of the camp.” Grumbling can be a problem. None of us are above the temptation to murmur or complain, but we need to learn from the book of Numbers that this is a serious issue with God. He sent fire to consume some, swallowed up others with the earth, and sent fiery serpents among the people, all because of complaining!

The Bible also has many verses that touch on the subject of gratitude.

  • 1 Chronicles 16:8 says…..Oh give thanks to the Lord; call upon his name; make known his deeds among the peoples!
  • Psalm 7:17 says….. I will give thanks to the Lord because of his righteousness; I will sing the praises of the name of the Lord Most High.
  • 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 says….Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
  • Colossians 3:15 says….Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.

Those are just a few examples, but with having so many verses regarding gratitude there’s no doubt how God feels about it. If anybody in this world should be grateful it should be Christians! God has shown us so much love, grace, and has blessed us both materially and spiritually beyond measure and we should be expressing a spirit of gratitude living as a Christian! We as Christians should being showing gratitude throughout all aspects of our life and let our light shine! If we go around complaining or being ungrateful what kind of example are we setting and how can we expect to evangelize to the lost? They’re response might be, “I don’t want any part of that religion”!

Not only should we show gratitude toward God, we should show gratitude toward our fellow man. Some simple acts of gratitude could be just saying thank you, a thank you card, email, or text. Occasionally, I will receive a thank you note or message from a fellow church member for something that I didn’t think was a big deal but it still meant a lot to receive that.

I would challenge all of us to keep working hard towards a grateful attitude. If you have a moment where you lapse, there are many scriptures to study regarding this subject. Let’s concentrate on the things God has given us not the things we don’t have. Let’s stay focused on the big picture which is our Heavenly home. Having a grateful attitude pleases our Father and is contagious. After all, would you rather fellowship with grateful or ungrateful people? Be careful, as they say misery loves company!

When The Devil Bites

Tuesday’s Column: Dale Mail

Dale Pollard

Tasmanian devils are named for their chilling shrieks that can be heard when the sun goes down on the island of Tasmania. The sound of the devils crying in the night reminded the early colonists of the mythical hellhounds. Despite their terrifying calls, these creatures aren’t as much of a danger to humans as they are to themselves. Not so long ago a vicious cancer began killing these animals and the cause of the disease was a mystery. As scientists began to study them, they discovered that the cancerous tumors were self-inflicted. It’s not uncommon for the Tasmanian devils to fight and bite one another over a carcass or the rights to a female. A devil’s ears will burn a bright red color when they become upset but by lashing out at one another they further their own extinction. The bites they inflict on one another are likely to develop into the mutating cancer that will grow until they succumb to the disease itself, or starvation. You won’t see the ugly side of these animals in Looney Tunes, but there are some valuable lessons to be learned from this. At times we can be guilty of destroying one another through gossip or complaining and, sadly, the church isn’t immune to this disease. It’s no wonder that God warns us about the dangers through His New Testament authors. 

Consider the following verses: 

“Do not complain, brethren, against one another, so that you yourselves may not be judged; behold, the Judge is standing right at the door.” James 5.9 

“But if you bite and devour one another, take care that you are not consumed by one another.” Galatians 5.15 

“We should not test Christ, as some of them did—and were killed by snakes. And do not grumble, as some of them did—and were killed by the destroying angel.” 

I Corinthians 10.9-10 

While there’s much to be said about the damage that the tongue can inflict, it’s more productive to discuss solutions to the problem. Ironically, it’s a lack of productivity that often spawns gossip and complaints. As the old adage goes, 

“When there’s nothing to see and do, there’s much to hear and say.” 

Sadly, the darker side of closeness, history, and intimacy can be the breeding ground of gossip. The wounds inflicted and the trust that’s broken can be difficult, if not impossible, to repair. A song we teach to small children should be modeled by adults. 

O be careful little ears what you hear

O be careful little ears what you hear

For the Father up above

Is looking down in love

So, be careful little ears what you hear

O be careful little tongue what you say

O be careful little tongue what you say

For the Father up above

Is looking down in love

So, be careful little tongue what you say

Three Ways To Fight The Bite

  1. Avoid being a spreader. It will build your integrity and trustworthiness. 
  2. Make it a point to speak highly of the person being slandered. 
  3. Offer biblical solutions instead of contributing to the gossip. This assumes the person spreading the gossip is genuinely concerned about the person(s) they’re talking about. Have they confronted the subject of their gossip (Matt. 18.15-20)? If they’re unwilling to act but willing to talk— avoid them. 

On the last night of His life Jesus prayed the following, 

“I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me.” John 17.20-21 

If unity was on the mind of the Savior even as He faced the cross, it must be important. 

Unity: without it there’s pain but with it there’s unlimited power. 

via Flickr (credit: Mike Prince)